Kingdom of Loathing Spoilers

This text is a compilation of information to guide you through the browser game/MMORPG Kingdom of Loathing (KoL).
The best way to use this guide/FAQ/walkthrough is to use the search function to specifically find what you need.

• -Miscellaneous Tips-

1. -Quests-
2. -Familiars-
3. -Tattoos/Outfits-
4. -Effects-
5. -Recipes-
6. -Trophies-
7. -Item Locations-
8. -Skills-
9. -Ascension Info-
10. -Credits-

Links to other sources of KoL information. If there is something you can't find on this site, it's probably on one of these:
http://kol.coldfront.net - A solid fansite with a good deal of general information.
http://www.subjunctive.net/kol/FrontPage.html - A lot of good data on KoL, good recipes list.
http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki - KoL wiki. An excellent user updated database of KoL information.
http://www.allthetraffic.com/kol/ - A great recipe reference page.
http://www.lysator.liu.se/~jhs/KoL/effects/ - - Comprehensive item effect data for booze, food other usable items.
http://www.giantmotorsports.com/rares/ - A very interesting site detailing rare items in KoL.
http://kol.thraeryn.org/moons.php - Astrological Predictions. Check the dates of upcoming events.
http://kol.network-forums.com/viewtopic.php?t=218 - Forum post detailing monster HP and XP.
http://www.kingdomofloathing.com - The Kingdom of Loathing web browser game. The reason this file exists.

1) -Miscellaneous Tips-

• Eat as much food as possible. Food gives you extra adventures and increases your stats.
• Different foods will fill you up at different rates. Even if you are too full to eat another pizza, you might still have room for a slice of toast.
• Alcohol is also good for getting extra adventures, but makes you Drunk. If drunkenness gets greater than 14 (or 19 with a Liver of Steel), adventuring becomes impossible. One way to combat this is to drink the alcohol at the end of your turn; the adventures will carry over to the next day while the Drunkenness will not.
• Join a clan when you reach level 3 (the minimum level to join). Being in a clan that has a calendar will give 3 extra turns a day. If the clan has a meat stash and 50k meat in its coffers, you will also receive 500 meat a day.
• Dwellings (like a tent, cottage or house) placed in you campground increase the amount of HP recovered when you rest as well as helping in PvP.
• It does not hurt to be a packrat. Seemingly useless items could prove to be very useful in the future.
• If possible, always combine your food items together. Cooking/Mixing will allow you to eat more food/drink.
• If you do not have an immediate need of a ten-leaf clover, "use" it in the inventory. This will turn it into a disassembled clover, and will allow you to save it for later.
• A good place to get stats is the hidden temple. The best place for meat drops is the Icy Peak.

• Muscle determines how often and how hard you hit.
• Mysticality determines the amount of MP you have and the effect of spells.
• Moxie determines your ability to avoid damage.

PvP

• Before you break the Magical Mystical Hippy Stone to allow PvP, you should establish some defences.
• Try to PvP when you are close to leveling up. Since you only fight with players of similar level, you will have a slight stats advantage if you are close to leveling up.
• PvP matches the stat you picked to fight with against an opponent's stat. So when choosing opponents, make sure that their class is not high in your stat. For example: If you are a seal clubber (high muscle), don't fight a turtle tamer (who also have high muscle) instead, pick on an Accordion Thief, who have low muscle but high moxie.
• Watch for players wearing an outfit, the outfits often have poorer stats then the equipment you would normally wear. Conversely, stay away from people with good equipment (eg Mr. Accessory).
• Pay attention to campground items. See who has scarecrows (weakens Mus), flowers (weakens Mox), or Good Feng Shui (weakens Mys). If you find someone weak against your prime stat, attack them.
• Check on people's win/loss ratios. Obviously, those with more losses than wins should be easier to fight.
• Try to be relatively drunk when PvPing.
• Compile a list of players who you easily defeat and fight these players every day. PvP is one of the best sources of stat points (assuming you win).
• See the Coldfront PvP guide for more information on PvP
  

  2) -Quests-

  Council of Loathing Quests

  1. Toot Oriole
  2. Distant Woods
  3. Typical Tavern
  4. Boss Bat
  5. Dark And Dank Sinister Cave
  6. King of Cobb's Knob
  7. Deep Fat Friars
  8. The Cyrpt
  9. Mt. McLargeHuge and the L337 Tr4pz0r
  10. Strange Leaflet
  11. Orc Chasm
  12. The Beanstalk
  13. Naughty Sorceress
      • Entrance Cavern
      • Hedge Maze and Tower
      • Final Battle

  Class Guild Quests

  1. Guild Hall
  2. Bitchin' Meat Car
  3. The White Citadel

  Campsite

  1. The Campground
  2. Tiny Plastic Figurines
  3. Feng Shui
  4. Pagoda (Hey Deze Map)

  Maps and misc quests

  1. Dr Hobos Map
  2. The Dolphin Kings Map
  3. The Slug Lords Map
  4. Spooky Temple Map (Hidden Temple)
  5. Giant Castle Map (The Hole In The Sky)
  6. Hey Deze Map (Pagoda)
  7. Pretentious Painter
  8. Untinker's Screwdriver
  9. The Gourd Tower
  10. Tame The Bugbears
  11. Summon a Mushroom Familiar
  12. The Spooky Gravy Barrow
  13. Spanish fly trap
  14. Doc Galaktik

  Events and locations

  1. Halloween
  2. Oyster Egg Day
  3. St. Sneaky Pete's Day
  4. The Feast of Boris
  5. Crimbo Town
  6. Cola Wars
  7. The Airship
  8. 31337 Scroll and the UB3r 31337 HaX0R
  9. The Palindome
  10. The Cake-Shaped Arena
  11. The Daily Dungeon
  12. The Dungeons of Doom
  13. Fernswarthy's Basement
  14. The Haiku Dungeon
  15. Grey Plague
  16. Zombie Plague
  17. Spookyraven Manor
  
  Council Of Loathing Quests:
  Toot Oriole:
  The first Kingdom of Loathing quest is essentially a tutorial. The Toot Oriole (found in Mt Noob) will tell you to adventure in the Noob Cave until you get a pile of shiny pebbles. Equip your starting equipment and cast your 1MP starting class skill before adventuring in The Dire Warren where you must get a bunny liver. After finding the bunny liver and returning, the Toot Oriole gives you a bowl of oriole's nest soup. Return to The Dire Warren to find 40 meat, which you must then use to purchase chewing gum on a string from The Market. Visit the Sewer in the Market Square and you will fish a worthless trinket out with the chewing gum on a string. Buy a Hermit Permit from the Market, go to The Hermitage, trade the worthless item for the Golden Twig and return to Mt. Noob. Your next task is to combine an Action Figure Body and Head together. Make some meat paste from the miscellaneous category of your inventory, click on "combine stuff", select the Action Figure Body and Head in the drop down menu's and click Combine. Now take the newly created Action Figure to the Toot Oriole to receive Mt. Noob Pale Ale and a Certificate of Participation.
  
  Distant Woods (or Looking for a Larva in All the Wrong Places):
  When you reach level two, the council will ask you to go to the Spooky Forest (which is in the newly opened Distant Woods) for mosquito larva. Adventure in the forest until you have some and return to the council for a reward of 500 meat.
  
  Typical Tavern (or Ooh, I Think I Smell a Rat):
  You receive this quest when you reach level 3. When you adventure at the Typical Tavern in The Distant Woods, you will be presented with a grid. Under each part of the cellar, you might encounter one of four types of adventures:
  
  • A fight with a drunken rat. This is the most common type.
  • Free drink (bottle of rum, boxed wine, ice-cold beer, ice-cold fotie or a Disco Bandit type drink)
  • Baron Von Ratsworth, a boss whose damage is based on your moxie. Drops special items*
  • Rat faucet - turning this off will end the quest
  Once you turn off the rat faucet, you will receive a Shiny Ring (+3 all stats) and three drinks.
  *Baron Von Ratsworth will normally drop Baron Von Ratsworth's monocle. If the Super-Secret Canadian Mind-Control Device is set to two, he drops Baron Von Ratsworth's money clip (+10/15% meat from monsters). If set to 9, he drops Baron Von Ratsworth's tophat (75 power, +5 all stats).
  Boss Bat (or Ooh, I Think I Smell a Bat):
  Fight in The Bat Hole until you get a Pine Fresh Air Freshner. Equip it and fight in Guano Junction (any item that gives stench resistance allows you to enter the Guano Junction, eg: the asshat). Adventure in Guano Junction until you have three sonar-in-a-biscuits. Every sonar-in-a-biscuit you use will unlock a new area in the Bat Hole, the last one unlocked will be the Boss Bat's Lair. Enter and kill the Boss Bat to get an item, then take that item to the Council Of Loathing to get a Batskin Belt and quest completion. If you set The Super-Secret Canadian Mind-Control Device to setting 4 for the battle with the boss bat, you will get the Boss Bat Britches (65 power, +5 Moxie). If you set it to setting 8, you will get the Boss Bat Bling (accessory, +3 Mus, +3 Mox)
  
  Dark And Dank Sinister Cave:
  Enter the Dark And Dank Sinister Cave. Equip a Gnollish Flyswatter (from Degrassi Knoll), to solve the Fly Bend. Have a Cog and a Sprocket in your inventory to open the next door. The Lavatory Troll needs Fairy Gravy, which can be found in the Haiku Dungeon. Equip Knob Goblin Tongs to get through the salad door. The next obstacle needs Ketchup or Catsup so get a worthless item from the sewer (using Chewing Gum on a string) and trade it at the The Hermitage for the Ketchup or Catsup. The final room is combat with your nemesis. Defeating him completes the quest and gives you a hat (50 power and +7 to your main stat).
  
  King of Cobb's Knob (or The Goblin Who Wouldn't Be King):
  When you reach level 5, the Council of Loathing will ask you to kill the Goblin King and will open up Cobb's Knob. You will need the Knob Goblin Perfume, Knob Goblin Harem Veil and Knob Goblin Harem Pants from Inside Cobb's Knob. Equip the Veil and Pants, and then use the perfume. This will turn you into a Knob Goblin Harem Girl for one turn. Enter the King's Chamber and defeat him to get the Crown of the Goblin King (70 power, +10 Mus) and two dense meat stacks. Quest complete. If you set The Super-Secret Canadian Mind-Control Device to setting 7 for the battle with the Goblin King, you will get the Cape of the Goblin King (accessory, +7 Mox). If set to 3, you will get the Glass Balls of the Goblin King (accessory, +14 Mys). Not related to this quest but related to this location is the fact that you can equip the Knob Goblin Elite Guard Uniform when visiting the Cobb's Knob Laboratory to get a list of items to buy.
  
  Deep Fat Friars (or Trial By Friar):
  Given to you when you hit level 6 and complete the Typical Tavern quest. Head to the Grove Of The Deep Fat Friars in the Distant Woods and speak to the Friars to learn their problem. Head to the Dark Neck Of The Woods and adventure until you get the dodecagram, do the same in The Dark Heart Of The Woods for the Birthday Candles, and in The Dark Elbow Of The Woods to get the Eldrich Butterknife. Head to the taint with all three items to complete the quest and get the Liver Of Steel skill, which allows you to get up to 20 drunkness. If you have ascended and are a Teetotaller, you will get a Stomach of Steel instead, which allows 20 fullness. If you are an Oxygenarian you will get a Spleen of Steel, which allows the consumption of more stat boosting items.
  
  The Cyrpt (or Cyrptic Emanations):
  The next quest set by the Council Of Loathing (when you reach level 7) is a simple one. Head to the Crypt in the Nearby Plains. Adventure in the Defiled Areas until you encounter a boss creature. Defeat each of the 4 bosses to complete the 4 areas. Once all four areas are gone, adventure into the Haert Of The Crypt and kill the boss to get two items, now go to the council to get a Dragonbone Belt Buckle. Combine this with the Batskin Belt to get the Badass Belt Accessory (+5 all major stats), use the Chest of the Bonerdagon to get a 150 Boost to each stat and 3,000 meat. If you set The Super-Secret Canadian Mind-Control Device to setting 5 for the battle with the Bonerdagon, you will get the Rib of the Bonerdagon (80 power, +5 Mus, +5 Mys, +15 Spell Damage). If set to 10, you will get the vertebra of the Bonerdagon (which can be made into a Bonerdagon necklace (+5 Mus, +5 Mox, +30% initiative).
  
  Mt. McLargeHuge and the L337 Tr4pz0r (or It's a Trap!):
  The council will ask you to visit the L337 Tr4pz0r who is located at Mt. McLargeHuge in The Big Mountains after you reach level 8. He asks for 3 pieces of ore (either asbestos, chrome or linoleum), which available from the newly opened Itznotyerzitz Mine. You will need to wear the Mining Gear (7-Foot Dwarven Mattock, Miner's Pants and Miner's Helmet) from the mine to get the ore. Return to the Trapper and he will smith you an ore item based on your class. Muscle based classes get an asbestos/chrome/linoleum sword, Mysticality classes get an asbestos/chrome/linoleum staff, and Moxie classes get an asbestos/chrome/linoleum crossbow. Next he asks for 6 chunks of goat cheese, which you can find from The Goatlet. Give him the cheese and he will give you three goat cheese pizzas. The Tr4pz0r will now ask you to get the eXtreme Cold-Weather Gear (eXtreme Mittens, eXtreme Scarf and Snowboarder Pants) from The eXtreme Slope. You can either return with the gear, or you can find some other method of getting cold resistance (like an elemental saucephere). He will then take you to the Icy Peak where he will give you five yeti furs and 5,000 Meat. Mt. McLargeHuge is now completely open for adventuring and you can go back to The L33t Tr4pz0r's C4b1n to trade furs.
  
  Strange Leaflet:
  The strange leaflet is given to you by the Council Of Loathing when you reach level 9. The leafet is a text based adventure controlled by various commands like: "i, use, read, open, take, cut, light, climb, look at, kill, exit, etc.". To begin the quest, use the leaflet and type the following instructions in order:
  open door, east, take sword, west, north, cut hedge, pick up stick, west, light stick, east, north, kill serpent, open chest, look behind chest, look in hole You should now possess a Frobozz Real-Estate Company Instant House (TM) (campground item, the best dwelling) and a grue egg (a familiar). You can continue the quest with these commands:

south, south, east, examine fireplace, examine tinder, examine parchmentThis will allow you to later memorize a spell which you will be able to use in normal combat. light fireplace, take boots, put on boots At this point type: "examine fireplace ". There will be one of five objects here. If you see a trophy, take it using "take trophy ". This allow you to get the Brass Bowling Trophy Trophy. The other four objects have secret words tied to each of them that provide a large stat bonus. The commands are detailed at the end of this section. west, south, south, south You should now be in dense forest. Simply move in any direction about 5 times and you will leave the maze. Note that once inside the maze, you will not be able to return to the previous parts of this adventure. climb tree, take egg, look at petunias, throw egg at roadrunner, down, look in leaves, up, throw ruby at petunias If you have the parchment from inside the house, you can now type: "gnusto cleesh " to memorize the cleesh spell from the scroll you just found. This will allow you to cast this spell in combat for 10 MP. The spell turns creatures into a newt, a frog, or a salamander. The transformed creatures drop a eye of newt, a squashed frog or a salamander spleen, respectively. If you want this spell, you must memorize it before using it on the giant or the cleesh scroll will be lost. up, cleesh giant, take ring This will give you the giant pinky ring and end the quest.
There is a secret code that will give you a stat bonus. The code is one of: xyzzy, plugh, plover, yoho.
Note that you can only try these codes once, so you must get it right the first try. The codes are tied to the items found after examining the fireplace.
plover is tied to finding the bird, plugh the brick wellhouse, yoho the ship and xyzzy the white house.
Opening up The Valley Beyond The Orc Chasm requires you be level 9 and some running around. You first need to make a Dingy Dinghy (Get the Dingy Planks from the Hermit and the Dinghy Plans from the Shore, then use the plans). The Dinghy will open up the Mysterious Island Of Mystery. Adventure in the Obligatory Pirate's Cove to obtain the Swashbuckling Getup (swashbuckling pants, stuffed shoulder parrot and eyepatch). Dress up in the Swashbuckling Getup once you have all the components and adventure in the Pirates Cove to get the Abridged Dictionary. Go to the Untinkerer in town and have him untinker the Abridged Dictionary into a Bridge and a dictionary. You can now cross the Orc Chasm using the bridge. Use the dictionary against the enemies here, it will deal more damage that a normal attack and has unlimited uses. Fight until you collect two 334 Scrolls, a 33398 Scroll and a 30669 Scroll. Combine the two 334 Scrolls together to get a 668 Scroll, then combine the 30669 and 33398 Scrolls to get a 64067 Scroll. Combine the 64067 scroll with the 668 scroll to finally make the 64735 scroll. Use the 64735 scroll to complete the quest and you will get a Drywall Axe (150 power) as a reward. You can now sell the facsimile dictionary for 21337 meat. As a bonus, you can also make a 31337 Scroll out of a 668 Scroll with a 30669 Scroll.
The Council will tell you that garbage is piling up in the Nearby Plains after you attain level 10. Get an enchanted bean from the Beanbat Chamber and use it (This will only work if you have received the quest from the council). It will grow into a enormous beanstalk in the Nearby Plains. Complete The Penultimate Fantasy Airship quest to gain access to The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky. Adventure in the Castle until you encounter the "Wheel in the Clouds in the Sky, Keep On Turning". Turn the wheel so it is no longer the Procrastination Giant's job to take out the trash. Return to the council and they will give you a giant discarded plastic fork (staff, 155 power) as a reward. Quest Complete.
When you reach level 11 and have completed all previous council quests, the Council of Loathing will open up the final area: The Lair of the Naughty Sorceress.
To get past the first gate you must use a Tasty Fun Good Rice Candy (found in The Valley Beyond The Orc Chasm) to get a Sugar Rush. For the next gate, you must use a wussiness potion (from The Deep Fat Friars' Gate), and for the last gate, you need a Thin Black Candle (Goth Giants in the Giant Castle drop it).

The next location is The Huge Mirror. To get past the mirror, you must "show your true self" by taking all your gear off, including any items equipped on your familiar. Visiting the mirror again will shatter it, leaving you with a huge mirror shard.

To pass the Perplexing Door, you will need several keys: Key Where to find key Solution to test Reward

Boris Key	end of the Daily Dungeon	"fish"	Fish Bowl
Jarlsberg Key	end of the Daily Dungeon	"phish"	fishtank
Sneaky Pete Key	end of the Daily Dungeon	"fsh"	fish hose
Skeleton Key	combine Skeleton Bone and Loose Teeth	bring a ten-leaf clover	stone tablet (Really Evil Rhythm)
Richard's Star Key	using a Star Chart and entering 8 stars and 7 lines	equip a star hat and a star weapon (star crossbow, sword or staff), and have a star starfish as your familiar	stone tablet (Sinister Strumming)
Digital Key	give the Crackpot Mysic 30 white pixels	enter "up up down down left right left right b a"	stone tablet (Squeezings of Woe)
Balloon Monkey*	combine four long skinny balloons	N/A	Easter Egg balloon (+5 all major stats)

*Note that the Balloon Monkey is a bonus and is not required to pass this section.

To pass the Perplexing Odor, you must combine the Fish Hose with a Fish Bowl, and then combine the Hosed Fisbowl with fishtank to get the Makeshift SCUBA Gear. Equip the gear and revisit the odor to partially activate the Stone Mariachis.

To pass The Stone Mariachis you need: 1) an acoustic guitarrr or a stone banjo/Disco banjo, 2) a stolen accordion or a Rock and Roll Legend, and 3) a bone rattle or a tambourine. You only need one item for each Mariachi. Completing the Stone Mariachis will open up a new area to adventure in - The Hedge Maze.
Mariachi Item required (one of) Where to acquire item

1st	acoustic guitarrr	Found in the Obligatory Pirates Cove
heavy metal thunderrr guitarrr	Combine an acoustic guitarrr with chrome ore
Disco Banjo	Combine a stone banjo and a disco ball
stone banjo	Combine a big rock and banjo strings
2nd	stolen accordion	Found in the sewer
Rock and Roll Legend	Combine heart of rock and roll and stolen accordion
3rd	bone rattle	Combine a Skeleton Bone and a broken skull
tambourine	Combine tambourine bells and a Gnollish Pie Tin

In The Hedge Maze, battle until a monster drops a hedge maze puzzle. In the puzzle, create a path to the key and adventure in the Maze again. You will get a hedge maze key. Now create a path out of the Maze in the puzzle and reenter the Maze. The Sorceress' Tower is now open.

The Sorceress' Tower is a series of six enemies undefeatable by normal combat; you must use special items to kill them. The order of the enemies is randomly generated and will be different for each player. Here are the solutions:
Enemy Item used to defeat enemy Where to get the item

Beer Batter	baseball	Guano Junction
Big Meat Golem	meat vortex	The Valley Beyond The Orc Chasm
Bowling Cricket	sonar-in-a-biscuit	Guano Junction
Electron Submarine	photoprotoneutron torpedo	The Penultimate Fantasy Airship
Enraged Cow	barbed-wire fence	Large Donkey Mountain Ski Resort (Shore)
Fickle Finger of F8	razor-sharp can lid	The Haunted Pantry
Flaming Samurai	frigid ninja stars	The Lair of the Ninja Snowmen
Giant Desktop Globe	NG	Combine Lowercase N and Original G
Ice Cube	can of hair spray	Buy from The Demon Market
Pretty Fly	spider web	The Sleazy Back Alley
Tyrannosaurus Tex	chaos butterfly	The Castle In The Clouds In The Sky
Vicious Easel	disease	The "Fun" House

Next is a number logic puzzle unique for each player. The heavy door is locked with a 3 digit code you must get by solving the puzzle given by the light door. There does not seem to be a universal solution to this other than working it out yourself. Here is a good, if slightly long, guide that can help you through the puzzle.
Alternately, if you want an immediate solution, either Cisco's Door Code Generator or MaxDemian's Door Code Generator will provide it.

Have the huge mirror shard equipped to deflect the energy beam.

Next is your shadow opponent. It is impervious to normal attacks. All you can do is heal, which is the key to this fight. Red pixel potions are the best healing item in the game and are extremely useful here. Using four red pixel potions during the battle should do the trick.

You now face two of the sorceress's giant familiars. You will need one of your familiars to act as an "anti-familiar" to fight against hers. Your familiar must be at least 20 pounds (including any buffs and equipment) to win the fight. To beat the Use the

Angry Goat	Mosquito
Mosquito	Sabre-Toothed Lime
Sabre-Toothed Lime	Levitating Potato
Levitating Potato	Barrrnacle
Barrrnacle	Angry Goat

Finally you will face The Naughty Sorceress in combat. She will remove all yours buffs before fighting so don't bother buffing yourself up. She has three stages. The first two stages are normal combat except for the fact that she can block your actions some of the time. How often she blocks you actions depends on how many times you have fought her. The more you fight her, the less she blocks actions and the easier she is. Her final stage requires that a Wand of Nagamar be equipped. To create a Wand of Nagamar, combine WA (Ruby W and Metallic A) and ND (Lowercase N and Heavy D) together. Her damage to you in battle is determined by your moxie. Low moxie weakens her attack. The seal clubber skills Thrust-Smack and Double-Fisted Skull Smashing are both very useful against the NS.

Good items to use in the battle are Furry Suit (reduce her strength in combat) or the Star Garb (make yourself as powerful as possible). Any damage dealing accessories help greatly here. Flaming talons, a kickback cookbook, enchanted toothpicks, enchanted brass knuckles, or an acid-squirting flower are all good picks. Damage absorbing items do not work against her. Some good combat items to use in battle are cola grenades, throwing stars, torpedos, and plot holes.

A Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot is probably the most effective familiar to use, as it can damage, heal and delay the NS. A Ghost Pickle on a Stick is effective in combat. It will both damage and slow the Sorceress. Dodecapedes are also excellent damage dealers.

Once you have defeated her, click on the kings prison to free him. You may now Ascend by clicking on the rift.

Other Quests: Dr. Hobo's Map is found in the Outskirts Of Cobb's Knob. You need an Asparagus Knife (from the Haunted Pantry), and must have a Cool Whip (bought from the Market) equipped. Use the map to complete the quest and get Dr. Hobo's scalpel (35 power, +3 damage).
This map is found in the Haunted Pantry. Equip a Snorkel bought from The Armory and Leggery and use the Dolphin King's Map to complete the quest and receive 150 meat and the Dolphin King's crown (35 power, +2 all stats) as a reward.
This map is found in the Sleazy Back Alley on The Wrong Side of the Tracks. Equip any item that provides Stench Resistance (the asshat or the Pine Fresh Air Freshner from the Entryway of the Bat Hole is one) and then use the map to complete the quest, you will get Pants Of The Slug Lord (35 power, so-so stench resistance) as a reward.
Adventuring in the Spooky Forest will eventually yield a Spooky Temple Map, a Spooky Sapling and some Spooky-Gro fertilizer. Use the Spooky Temple Map with all three items in your inventory to open the Hidden Temple.
The painter is on The Wrong Side Of The Tracks in The Dirt-Walled Hovel of The Pretentious Artist. He wants you to find his Pretentious Paint (located in the Sleazy Back Alley), pretentious paintbrush (found in Outskirts Of Cobb's Knob) and pretentious palette (in the Haunted Pantry). Once you have the items, take them back to the painter to unlock the ability to get tattoos. You will also get a starter tattoo. See the tattoo section on how to get the rest of the tattoos. Once you complete his quest, you will get to keep the pail (30 power helmet) and he will buy rat whiskers from you for 50 meat each.
The untinkerer is located on the Right Side Of The Tracks. You must find his Rusty Screwdriver (in the Degrassi Knoll). If you have ascended under a muscle sign, Innabox will give you the screwdriver instead. Upon completion of the quest, the untinkerer will disassemble items for you.
Found in The Right Side of the Tracks, The Captain of the Gourd wants 5 firecrackers (found in The Outskirts of Cobb's Knob) if you are a Seal Clubber/Turtle Tamer. If you are a Pastamancer/Sauceror, he will want 5 Razor-Sharp Can Lids (from the Haunted Pantry). And if you are a Disco Bandit/Accordian Thief, he will want Spider Webs (from The Sleazy Back Alley). When you bring the 5 items back, you will receive a gourd potion (which increases your primary substat by around 35). This quest can be repeated, but the number of item you need to bring back increases by one each time you complete the quest. After you retrieve the 25th item in this quest, The Captain will tell you the gourd tower is safe and will stop giving the quest.
When you have planted a Beanstalk and reached level 10, you can adventure in the The Penultimate Fantasy Airship. Fight here until you collect the four Immaterias and get a S.O.C.K and a Giant Castle Map. The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky is now open for adventuring.
Collect a Furry Fur, a Giant Needle and an Awful Poetry Journal from The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky. Make sure it is the Procrastination Giant's turn to guard the Castle's back door (rotate the wheel in The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky to achieve this). Use the Giant Castle Map to complete the quest and get the Quantum Egg. Combine the Egg with the S.O.C.K to get the Intergalactic Rowboat, which opens the The Hole In The Sky for adventuring.
Combine two 334 scrolls (from the Orc Chasm) to get a 668 Scroll. Combine the newly made 668 Scroll with a 30669 Scroll (also from the Orc Chasm) to make a 31337 Scroll. Use the 31337 Scroll to summon the UB3r 31337 HaX0R who gives you a stat script (which increases each substat by ~150) and a Hermit Script (which eliminates the need for Hermit Permits). If you try to make and use another 31337 scroll, you will only get 3-5 worthless gewgaws/trinkets/knickknacks.
Adventure in the The Hippy Camp on The Mysterious Island of Mystery until you have the Feng Shui For Big Dumb Idiots, the Decorative Fountain and the Windchimes. Then just use the Feng Shui For Big Dumb Idiots to complete the quest. Really Good Feng Shui increases the amount of MP you recover when you rest in your campground by 7. It also weakens the Mysticality of attackers in PvP.
Combine two snakehead charrrms to form a Talisman O'Nam. You must have the Talisman equipped to access the Palindome, which is located in The Nearby Plains.
Collect a Drab Sonata, Ketchup Hound, Guitar Pick and Elf Farm Raffle Ticket by adventuring in The Palindome. Get an acoustic guitarrr from the Obligatory Pirate's Cove, a Hey Deze Map from the Friar's Gate, and two Chrome Ores from the Mine. You will also need a Ten-Leaf Clover from the Hermit. Use the Elf Farm Raffle Ticket to get the Pagoda Plans (this will use up the ten-leaf clover). Combine a Chrome Ore with the acoustic guitarrr to get a Heavy Metal Thunderrr Guitarrr, then combine the other Chrome Ore with the Drab Sonata to make a Heavy Metal Sonata. Now use the Hey Deze Map to get Hey Deze Nuts. Finally, use the Ketchup Hound. You now have a Pagoda in your campground. It will double the amount of HP and MP you recover when resting and also provide 3 extra adventures a day. Completing this quest also unlocks the Palindrophy trophy.
The Daily Dungeon is found in the Dungeon Full of Dungeons in town. It is randomized every day, but is always 10 rooms long and always has a boris/jarlsberg/sneaky pete related item as a reward in the 10th room. You will often fight normal monsters, but other obstacles exist. Locked Doors may be opened one of three ways: Lockpick it with the Pick-O-Matic lockpicks, use a key (consumes a key, but does not cost a turn), or bash it down (can damage you). Other obstacles with test your stats, if the appropriate stat is high enough, you pass the room. The last kind of obstacle is the rooms that tests resistance to environmental effects. Examples of this room are the Hot Floor, Giant Creepy Floating Skull, Sewage Moat or open refrigerator. Equip items that provide resistance to these effects, or get an Elemental Saucesphere cast on yourself to pass these rooms.
Adventure at The Enormous Greater-Than Sign in The Dungeon Full of Dungeons until you have a plus sign in your possession and are affected by Teleportitis. Continue adventuring until you encounter an oracle and take a Greater Consultation. The oracle will tell you to read the plus sign. Do it, and The Enormous Greater-Than Sign will become to stairs to The Dungeons of Doom.
Once you unlock the Dungeons of Doom, you have a chance to get a wand at the Izchak's Lighting Store adventure. A wand will allow you to "zap" most items in the game, converting them into similar items. The encounter will ask you if you want a magic lamp or a cloak. Buy the cloak for 5000 meat. This will start a battle with a mimic. Defeat the mimic and it will drop a dead mimic. Use the dead mimic to get a wand. You will get either an aluminum, marble, hexagonal, ebony, pine, or horizontal wand. The name does not matter. A wand will last for 1-4 zaps (in a day) before it explodes, destroying the wand and slightly damaging the user. If you only use the wand once a day, the wand will last forever. You can only have one wand per ascension.
Here is a list of what items can be zapped: Boris's key, Boris's ring, Jarlsberg's earring, Jarlsberg's key, Sneaky Pete's breath spray, Sneaky Pete's key pr0n chow mein, Knob sausage chow mein, bat wing chow mein components for outfits 30669 scroll, 33398 scroll, 334 scroll worthless gewgaw, worthless knick-knack, worthless trinket Changes booze into other booze of equivalent strength Changes food into other food of equivalent strength White picket fence, Barbed wire fence gum ruby W, heavy D, Metallic A, Lowercase N, Original G baconstone, hamethyst, porquoise potions chrome ore, linoleum ore, aesbestos ore cog, spring, sprocket Knob mushroom, Knoll mushroom, spooky mushroom spider web, razor-sharp can lid, Knob Goblin firecracker Decorative Fountain, Feng Shui For Big Dumb Idiots, Windchimes Penguin skin, Yak skin, Hippo skin Tiny Plastic Commons Tiny Plastic Uncommons Tiny Plastic Rares Wolf Masks, Furry Pants cornuthaum, vorpal blade black pixel, blue pixel, green pixel, red pixel, white pixel jug-o-magicalness, suntan lotion of moxiousness, etc. ring of aggravate monster, ring of adornment, ring of cold resistance, ring of conflict, ring of fire resistance, ring of gain strength, ring of increase damage seal tooth, disco ball, etc. hemp bracelet, necklace chain, piercing post, ring setting green-frosted astral cupcake, pink, blue, orange, purle Fernswarthy's Basement is found in the Dungeon Full of Dungeons in town. It is an endless dungeon that allows you to pick a stat to boost every 5 rooms. Every level checks your stats to see if you have enough muscle/moxie/mysticality to advance to the next level. You can advance farther that you normally could by using food/equipment that temporarily boosts stats. Items like the potion of temporary gr8ness are excellent for this.
While adventuring in The Haiku Dungeon, you will eventually come across a unique encounter that will ask you three questions. The key is knowing how a Haiku is structured: three lines with 5, 7 and 5 syllables. So for the first part, select an option that has 5 syllables in the sentence. For the second select 7, then one with 5 again. Get it correct and the chat channel "/haiku" will open up for you. You have completed the Most Extreme Haiku Dungeon Challenge.
A place where your familiar can fight to gain exp (every battle) and items (every ten battles). There are 4 events. The amount of experience you win in an event depends on how close you beat your opponent by. Narrowly defeating your opponent gets you 5 exp whereas crushing your enemy may only give you 1-2 exp. The events are as follows:
Ultimate Cage Match - The Baby Gravy Fairy, Barrrnacle, Blood-Faced Volleyball, Levitating Potato and Hovering Sombrero are weak in this event.
Scavenger Hunt - The Angry Goat, Grue, Sabre-Toothed Lime and MagiMechTech MicroMechaMech are weak at this event.
Obstacle Course - The Cocoabo, Ghuol Whelp, Leprechaun, Ghost Pickle and Clockwork grapefruit are weak at this event
Hide And Seek - The Howling Balloon Monkey, Killer Bee, Mosquito, Spooky Pirate Skeleton, Stab Bat, Star Starfish, Hovering Sombrero and Whirling Maple Leaf are weak at this event.
You can get more arena info here: http://www.subjunctive.net/kol/ArenaMechanics.html
Xylpher's KoL Familiar Tool will show you the best usage of the arena for your familiar.
Wear different costumes Trick-or-Treating to receive candy. As you adventure, you get one of four generic items (available to all of the costumes) or a costume-specific item. You can get this event on "Porktober 8th" or on Halloween.
The next time the Halloween even will occur is on September 20, 2006. The four generic adventures that you can encounter with any outfit: A Suspicious Looking Guy = Rock Pops Susie, The Arena Mistress = Yummy Tummy bean (3) The Apathetic Lizardman = Mr. Mediocrebar The Market Demon = 2-5 Meat The outfit specific treats: 8-bit finery = Pixellated Candy Heart Arboreal Raiment = sugar-coated pine cone Bow Tux = candy cane Bugbear Disguise = cog, spring, and a sprocket Cloaca Uniform = Dyspepsi grenade Clockwork Apparatus = Sugar Cog Crimbo Duds = fruitcake Dyspepsi Uniform = Cloaca grenade eXtreme Cold Weather Gear = Wint-O-Fresh mint (2) Frat Boy = Any of the four bottled boozes Furry Suit = Tasty Fun Good rice candy Filthy Hippy Disguise = herb brownies Gnauga Hides = Gummi-Gnauga Hot and Cold Ninja Running Suit = Cold Hots candy Knob Goblin Elite Guard = Knob Goblin steroids Knob Goblin Harem Girl = Knob Goblin love potion Mining Outfit = dwarf bread OK Lumberjack Outfit = maple syrup Radio Free Regalia = (Gives nothing) Star Garb = Senior Mints Swashbuckling Getup = bottle of rum Time Trappings = Now and Earlier Yendorian Finery = candied kobold The following is a list of objects that can be in your campsite. Information on how to acquire these can be found in the rest of the guide. Tent/Cottage/House - Rest here to regain HP. Increases Muscle when attacked. The better the dwelling, the stronger the effect. Really good Feng Shui - Increase MP when you rest. Lower Mysticality of PvP opponents that attack. Pagoda - Double HP and MP restored when you rest. Gives 3 extra adventures a day. Colossal Closet - Store objects here. Beanbag Chair - Restore MP. Cheap Toaster - Use to get "toast". Can be used 3 times a day. Evil Golden Arches - Use to get evil food. Can be used only once a day. Trophy Case - Store your trophies. Kingdom of Loathing Certificate of Participation - Reward for completing the Toot Oriole quest. Bartender-in-the-box - Removes the adventure cost from mixing items. Chef-in-the-box - Removes the adventure cost from cooking items. Familiar-Gro™ Terrarium - Required for familiars. Purchased from The Market. Meat Locker - Protects from meat theft in PvP combat. Meat Maid - +4 adventures every day. Clockwork Maid - +8 adventures per day. Replaces the meat maid. Must be supertinkered Spooky Scarecrow - Reduce Muscle of attackers in PvP. Meat Golem - Reduces item theft in PvP combat. Magical Mystical Hippy Stone - Break to enable PvP. Bouquet of Pretty flowers (up to nine) - Reduces Moxie of attackers in PvP. White picket fence - Reduce attackers Mysticality and slightly increase MP regeneration when resting. You can have up to 9. Barbed wire fence - Damages attackers in PvP. You can have up to 9 of these. List of plastic figurines you can collect. You get Series 1 by eating Lucky Surprise Eggs (cook a cocoa egg with a ten-leaf clover). Series 1C was from the Crimbo '05 advent calendar. They are equipable as accessories. The letters C, U and R designate Common, Uncommon and Rare. Name Effect when equiped Series 1Series 1C

tiny plastic disco bandit (1/32, U)	(+2 moxie, +1 muscle)
tiny plastic accordion thief (2/32, U)	(+2 moxie, +1 mysticality)
tiny plastic turtle tamer (3/32, U)	(+2 muscle, +1 mysticality)
tiny plastic seal clubber (4/32, U)	(+2 muscle, +1 moxie)
tiny plastic pastamancer (5/32, U)	(+2 mysticality, +1 muscle)
tiny plastic sauceror (6/32, U)	(+2 mysticality, +1 moxie)
tiny plastic mosquito (7/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic leprechaun (8/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic levitating potato (9/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic angry goat (10/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic sabre-toothed lime (11/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic fuzzy dice (12/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic spooky pirate skeleton (13/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic barrrnacle (14/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic howling balloon monkey (15/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic stab bat (16/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic grue (17/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic blood-faced volleyball (18/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic ghuol whelp (19/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic baby gravy fairy (20/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic cocoabo (21/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic star starfish (22/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic ghost pickle on a stick (23/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic killer bee (24/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic Cheshire bat (25/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic coffee pixie (26/32, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic bitchin' meat car (27/32, U)	(+1 Adventure per day)
tiny plastic hermit (28/32, U)	(+6% Meat from Monsters)
tiny plastic Boris (29/32, R)	(+5 muscle, +3 mysticality, +3 moxie)
tiny plastic Jarlsberg (30/32, R)	(+5 mysticality, +3 muscle, +3 moxie)
tiny plastic Sneaky Pete (31/32, R)	(+5 moxie, +3 muscle, +3 mysticality)
tiny plastic Susie (32/32, R)	(+5 all attributes)
tiny plastic Crimbo elf (1/5, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic sweet nutcracker (2/5, C)	(+1 familiar weight)
tiny plastic Crimbo reindeer (3/5, C)	(+1 Adventure per day)
tiny plastic Crimbo wreath (4/5, U)	(Regenerate 1-2 MP per adventure)
tiny plastic Uncle Crimbo (5/5, U)	(+1 all stats)

This quest is given by Mayor Zapruder on the inside of Degrassi Knoll, which can only be accessed if you have ascended and picked a muscle sign. You need at least 13 points in your primary stat to begin this quest. The quest requires you to adventure in The Bugbear Pens until you encounter and defeat the Annoying Gravy Fairy. Return the annoying pitchfork to Mayor Zapruder to complete the quest. You will get to keep the annoying pitchfork (+5 to Monster Level) as a reward. Completing this quest will open up the Summon a Mushroom Familiar quest.
This quest is given by Mayor Zapruder on the inside of Degrassi Knoll, which can only be accessed if you have ascended and picked a muscle sign. The quest involves growing special mushrooms (either a warm mushroom, a frozen mushroom or a pointy mushroom) from the normal mushrooms (Knobb, Knoll and Spooky). You will need to purchase a Mushroom Patch in the Degrassi Knoll Mushroom Fields for 5,000 Meat to complete this quest.

Some points to keep in mind:

• Slots with a spore in them become slots with a mushroom in them the next day (spores grow up).
• Slots with mushrooms in them become empty slots the next day (mature mushrooms die).
• If a slot has exactly two mushrooms adjacent to it, that spot will grow into a new spore the next day, and the two parent mushrooms will disappear.
  For example (M represents a mushroom, S represents a new spore, x is a blank space): xMx Will become Sxx Mxx ----------> xSx xxx xxx
• Mating two mushrooms of the same type will create a spore of the parental type.
• Mating two mushrooms of differing type will produce a new type of spore as show below:
• If you require more information, see the Mushroom Fields Strategy section of the KoL Wiki.

Mating these Produces these

Knob and Knoll	cool
spooky and Knob	warm
spooky and Knoll	pointy
cool and pointy	frozen
cool and warm	stinky
warm and pointy	flaming

Example One
The simple method for breeding the mushrooms necessary is as follows, using frozen mushrooms as a goal.
The bold text represents mature, grown mushrooms. The normal text represents spores.
Day 1 Day 2 Day 3Day 4 Day 5 Day 6

Knoll Knob spooky Knoll	Knoll Knob spooky Knoll	cool cool pointy pointy
cool cool pointy pointy	frozen frozen	frozen frozen

Example Two
This plot produces more output, but requires more attention. It will produce 4 flaming mushrooms, 2 cool mushrooms, 2 frozen mushrooms, and 2 stinky mushrooms. For this to work properly, you must remove the two cool mushrooms indicated with *'s on the fourth day. The bold text represents mature, grown mushrooms. The normal text represents spores.
Day 1 Day 2 Day 3Day 4 Day 5 Day 6

spooky knoll knob knob knoll spooky	spooky knoll knob knob knoll spooky	pointy cool warm cool cool warm cool pointy
pointy cool warm *cool* *cool* warm cool pointy	flaming frozen flaming stinky stinky flaming frozen flaming	flaming frozen flaming stinky stinky flaming frozen flaming

You will receive a familiar whose type will be based on the type of mushroom you had to grow as a quest reward. The new area The Spooky Gravy Barrow will also be unlocked.
Mayor Zapruder's third quest requires you to clear out The Spooky Gravy Barrow (you must have a gravy fairy familiar from the previous quest equipped to access this area). Adventure here until you find an inexplicably glowing rock. The rock will allow you to enter the cave. Your next obstacle is a door. Find the spooky fairy gravy and small leather glove then cook these two together to obtain a spooky glove. Equipping the glove allows you to open the door. Finally, defeat Felonia, Queen of the Spooky Gravy Fairies in combat. She will drop a spooky cosmetics bag and a spooky bicycle chain. Return to Mayor Zapruder to obtain 6 mushroom fermenting solutions. Quest Complete.
As of November 6, 2005, this quest is no longer available in the game.
On Columbus Day (October 12, 2005), Cristobal Colon (#1492) started distributing comfy blankets. This new item made resting more effective, but had the side effect of giving users the "Grey Plague". Symptoms include coughing, shuddering, and having grey text in chat. The longer you have the plague, the worse the symptoms. It is thought that messaging other players will sometimes spread the disease to them.
To cure the plague, acquire either a blood flower (from the Icy Peak), a plastic passion fruit (from the Lemon Party Slot), or a lovecat tail (found in a questionable taco obtained from South of the Border). Bringing any one of these items to Doc Galaktik's Medicine Show in town will get you Doc's Miracle Cure, which removes the disease from your system. The Suspicious-Looking Guy in the Wrong Side of the Tracks will give you a pair of rose-colored glasses, which will make you appear healthy to yourself, but not actually cure you. This area is only accessible to characters of level 4 and 5. Enter the Temporal Rift in the plains to access The Nearby Plains in the Distant Past. A new area "A Battlefield" becomes available to fight at. The other locations are just for show and have no effect.

Possible encounters in The Cola Wars Battlefield:

• Some adventures give stats
• What is it Good For?
  • Help the Dyspepsi soldier: Dyspepsi-Cola helmet (30 Power, Damage Absorption +10)
  • Help the Cloaca soldier: Cloaca-Cola shield (Mysticality +1)
  • Don't get involved: minor moxie gain
• The Effervescent Fray
  • Listen to the red leader: Cloaca-Cola fatigues (30 Power, Mysticality +3)
  • Listen to the blue leader: Dyspepsi-Cola shield (Mysticality +1)
  • Don't get involved: minor magic gain
• Smells Like Team Spirit
  • Dyspepsi-Cola: Dyspepsi-Cola fatigues (30 Power, Mysticality +3)
  • Cloaca-Cola: Cloaca-Cola helmet (30 Power)
  • Don't get involved: minor muscle gain

Once you get the two new outfits, you can get these items adventuring at the battlefield:
Cola Wars Battlefield (Wearing the Cloaca Uniform):

• Cloaca-Cola knapsack (can give 3 Cloaca grenades, c-rations, Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife or a picture of a dead guy's girlfriend)
• Dyspepsi-Cola
• Dyspepsi-Cola d-rations
• Dyspepsi grenade

Cola Wars Battlefield (Wearing the Dyspepsi Uniform):

• Cloaca-Cola
• Cloaca-Cola c-rations
• Cloaca grenade
• Dyspepsi-Cola knapsack (can give 3 Dyspepsi grenades, d-rations, Dyspepsi-Cola-issue canteen or a picture of a dead guy's girlfriend)

Note that if you were present at the time of this event (Oct 27, 05), you got a petrified time. This is the only known way of getting this item (except trading with other players).
The Dyspepsi-Cola-issue canteen improves MP recovery from carbonated drinks.
The Cloaca-Cola-issue combat knife (30 power) restores MP when you do damage with it.
This location no longer in the game.
Yet another temporal rift has opened up, this time in the Council of Loathing. Enter the rift and adventure in town. Zombie variations of normal monsters appear here (with the same stats and drops) who will sometimes drop a zombie pineal gland. To complete the quest, take the zombie pineal glands to Doc Galaktik. He will convert the zombie pineal glands into loaded serum blowguns, which you can use to permanently cure yourself or others against the Gray Plague. After using a blowgun, you get an empty blowgun.
On "Boozember 7", your maximum fullness is temporarily raised by 15, effectively doubling the amount of food you can eat in a day. Cranberries also become more effective. Any consumable made with cranberries will give more adventures than usual. New monsters also randomly appear around the kingdom. They drop these items: candied yams, herbal stuffing, tofurkey leg, tofurkey gravy, can-shaped gelatinous cranberry sauce.
You will also be able to get the Three-Tiered Trophy on this day by eating a three-tiered wedding cake.
The next Feast of Boris will occur on September 27, 2006
This location only available during Christmas.
Accessible from The Big Mountains, Crimbo Town has three locations to visit: Uncle Crimbo's Mobile Home, where you can make toys, The Crimbo cafe, which sells food and drink, and the Crimbo Town Toy Factory, where you can fight striking elves. The difficulty of the elves scales with your skills. The more Muscle and Moxie you have, the tougher the fights are.
Items dropped: felt, googly eye, length of string, stuffing, toy wheel, wooden block

Items that can be made by Uncle Crimbo:
Top (1 Block + 1 Wheel) - combat item, confuses enemies
Rag Doll (2 Eyes + 3 Stuffing + 2 Felt) +3 Muscle when equipped as an "Off hand item"
Kite (1 String + 1 Felt) - combat item, delays enemy turn
marionette (2 Strings + 2 Eyes + 2 Blocks) +3 Mysticality when equipped as an "Off hand item"
ball (1 Stuffing + 1 Felt) - combat item, makes you retreat when used
sock monkey (2 Eyes + 3 Stuffing + 1 Felt) +3 Moxie when equipped as an "Off hand item"
stuffed doppelshifter (1 Eye + 1 Stuffing) - combat item, has various combat effects
duck-on-a-string (1 String + 2 Eyes + 2 Blocks + 2 Wheels) - 100 power 1-handed weapon, +5 damage, +5% Item Drops
pet rock (1 Eye + 1 Block) - familiar, sits motionless
toy train (2 Strings + 3 Blocks + 6 Wheels) - accessory, +10% dropped meat
yo-yo (1 String + 1 Wheel) - combat item
teddy bear: (2 eyes + 4 stuffing + 2 felt) - familiar
toy soldier (2 Eyes + 3 Blocks) - combat item
doll house (4 Blocks + 3 Felts) - gives 3-4 tiny plastic figures

Zapping the yo-yo turns it into a sleeping snowy owl. None of the other items can be zapped at this time.

Eventually, a Unionize The Elves sign (1h club, 50 power) will drop. Equiping this will allow you to fight reindeer. You can increase the chance of the sign dropping by using any item that reduces the chance of combat like a ring of conflict or deordorant. Killing 10 and 100 reindeer will get you two trophies. The reindeer are tough and scale up to your level, but they drop a large amount of meat. Your muscle and moxie are proportional to their moxie and muscle. That is, if you have high muscle, the reindeer will have high moxie (and be difficult to hit), if you have high moxie, the reindeer will have high muscle (and have lots of HP).
A recurring event in which "oyster eggs" are hidden around the land. Using eggs will produce a variety of effects.
You must have an oyster basket (purchased from The Market) to find eggs.
The next oyster egg day will occur on July 28, 2006. Egg Name Location(s) Effect

black paisley oyster egg	The Hippy Camp, The Penultimate Fantasy Airship	Egg-stortionary Tactics
black plastic oyster egg	The Obligatory Pirate's Cove	Combat item (steals meat)
black polka-dot oyster egg	The Dungeons of Doom, The Icy Peak	Egg-stortionary Tactics
black striped oyster egg	Cobb's Knob Treasury, Lair of the Ninja Snowmen	Egg-stortionary Tactics
blue paisley oyster egg	The Misspelled Cemetary, The Batrat and Ratbat Burrow	Gain ~30 MP
blue plastic oyster egg	The eXtreme Slope	Combat item (Restore ~45 MP)
blue polka-dot oyster egg	The Valley of Rof L'm Fao, Orcish Frat House	Gain ~30 MP
blue striped oyster egg	Degrassi Knoll	Gain ~30 MP
lavender paisley oyster egg	Outskirts of Cobb's Knob	Gain ~13 Mys and ~13 Mox
lavender plastic oyster egg	Entryway (The Bat Hole), Thugnderdome	Combat item (attacks)
lavender polka-dot oyster egg	The Typical Tavern, South of the Border	Gain ~25 Moxie
lavender striped oyster egg	Cobb's Knob Menagerie, Level 3	Gain ~12 Mus/Mox
mauve paisley oyster egg	Whitey's Grove	Gain ~25 Mys
mauve plastic oyster egg	Cobb's Knob Kitchens, Camp Logging Camp, The Sleazy Back Alley	Combat item (attacks)
mauve polka-dot oyster egg	Cobb's Knob Menagerie, Level 1	Gain ~12 Mys/Mox
mauve striped oyster egg	The Sleazy Back Alley	Gain ~12 Mus/Mys
off-white paisley oyster egg	The Hippy Camp (In Disguise)	Eggs-tra Sensory Perception
off-white plastic oyster egg	The Deep Fat Friars' Gate, The Goatlet	Combat item (confuses)
off-white polka-dot oyster egg	The Haiku Dungeon	Eggs-tra Sensory Perception
off-white striped oyster egg	The Roulette Tables	Eggs-tra Sensory Perception
puce paisley oyster egg	Itznotyerzitz Mine, Cobb's Knob Menagerie, Level 2	Gain ~12 Mus/Mys
puce plastic oyster egg	The Castle in the Clouds in the Sky, The Spooky Gravy Barrow	Combat item (attacks)
puce polka-dot oyster egg	the Haunted Pantry	Gain ~12 Mus/Mox
puce striped oyster egg	The Orcish Frat House (In Disguise), The Palindome	Gain ~25 Mus
red paisley oyster egg	The Spooky Forest	Restore ~35 HP
red plastic oyster egg	Knob Goblin Laboratory, The "Fun" House	Combat item (heals)
red polka-dot oyster egg	Cobb's Knob Harem, Guano Junction	Restore ~35 HP
red striped oyster egg	The Hole in the Sky, Itznotyerzitz Mine (In Disguise)	Restore ~35 HP
yellow paisley oyster egg	The Beanbat Chamber	Egg-headedness
yellow plastic oyster egg	Fernswarthy's Tower, The Hidden Temple	Comabt item (random)
yellow polka-dot oyster egg	The Poker Room	Egg-cellent Vocabulary
yellow striped oyster egg	The Limerick Dungeon	Egg-stra Arm

*Note that most non-combat usable eggs will additionally give 10-15 of a stat when used.
St. Sneaky Pete's Day is KoL's version of Saint Patrick's Day. On this day you able to make green beer (cocktailcraft ice-cold beer and a ten-leaf clover), which will allow you to exceed the normal drunkeness limits. Once your drunkeness goes above 25, you will start to get St. Sneaky Pete's Day Stupor adventures when you try to adventure normally. Adventure until you get a portable corkscrew (30 power weapon) and equip it. Continue adventuring until you get the Boozehare adventure, which gives you the St. Sneaky Pete's Day goodies basket. The basket provides ~5 oyster eggs, ~5 bottles of alcohol and one fake plastic grass when used. Fake plastic grass is a meatsmithing component for the Grass Guise outfit. Note that you can also use ! potions to raise your drunkeness by 1-3, and 668 scrolls occasionally give 10 drunkeness when used.

Previous versions of this event would give you a cheap plastic bottle opener and coloured traffic cones (orange traffic cone, yellow traffic cone, red traffic cone, green traffic cone, and a blue traffic cone). Traffic cones are 60 power hats that give +3 moxie and resistance to an element. If you had a female character, you could get an adventure where you would receive one of: string of blue beads, string of green beads, or string of red beads. The event on July 21st gave a blue ribbon.
As you adventure in the The Orcish Frat House, you will encounter an orc who asks you to get 5 spanish flies for him. To do this, you must first adventure in The Obligatory Pirate's Cove until you get a Spanish fly trap. Then, with the Spanish fly trap equipped in your off-hand, adventure at The Hippy Camp until you have at least five flies. Return to The Orcish Frat House and you will be rewarded with one "around the world" drink for every five spanish flies you bring back. This quest is repeatable.
There are three types of Guild Halls, one for each character class. Moxie classes have The Department of Shadowy Arts and Crafts Muscle classes have The Brotherhood of the Smackdown and Mystical classes have The League of Chef-Magi. You must pass three trials (simple tests of your characters primary stat) to be able to access the skill trainer, who teaches new skills for a price. Passing one more trial will open up the Guild Store. Your primary stat must be at least 6, 14, 18 or 20 for the first, second, third and fourth trials, respectively.
Visit your Guild Hall's quest giving NPC to receive a Degrassi Knoll shopping list and this quest. You must first gather a cog, an Empty Meat Tank, some Tires, a spring and a sprocket. Some of these are found inside Gnollish Toolboxes, which are found in Degrassi Knoll. You need the Sweet Rims, which you get from the Hermit by trading him a Worthless item. You will also need five Meat Pastes and a Meat Stack (must have 100 meat to make this), which can be made inside your inventory. Combine the Meat Stack with the Empty Meat Tank to get a Full Meat Tank, and combine the Tires with the Sweet Rims to get the Dope Wheels. Combine a spring and a sprocket, then combine the result with a cog to make Cog And Sprocket Assembly. Now combine the Full Meat Tank with the Cog And Sprocket Assembly to produce a Meat Engine, which you can then combine with the Dope Wheels to get a Bitchin' Meatcar. Return to your Guild Hall to complete the quest and to gain the ability to adventure at the Shore.
Given by the quest NPC in your Guild Hall, you are tasked with finding The White Citadel. You must first adventure at Whitey's Grove until you are able to access The Road to the White Citadel. Continue adventuring in The Road to the White Citadel until you get a massive bag of catnip from a hippy, which will allow you to pass the Cheetahs Never Lose adventure. You also need to get a hang glider, which will allow you to pass the Summer Holiday adventure. This will remove The Road to the White Citadel area, replacing it with The White Citadel area. Visit The White Citadel with 300 Meat to receive the White Citadel Satisfaction Satchel. Return to the quest NPC in your guild area and you will get the lucky rabbit's foot (+7% item and meat drops) as your quest reward.
If you visit Doc Galaktik's Medicine Show in town when you are at least level 6, you can accept his quest. He tasks you with finding three types of item: Three swindleblossoms, dropped by Knob Goblin Harem Girls in Cobb's Knob Harem, three sprigs of fraudwort, dropped by Demoninjas in Deep Fat Friars' Gate, and three bundles of shysterweed, dropped by grave rober zmobies or grave robers in The Misspelled Cemetary. Once you provide the Doc with the nine items he needs, he will give you a 40% discount on Curative Nostrums and Fizzy Invigorating Tonics at Doc Galaktik's Medicine Show.
Visit The Haunted Pantry until you encounter the 'The Manor in Which You're Accustomed' adventure, which will unlock the new Spookyraven Manor location. Several monsters here are resistant to physical damage and require elemental damage to hurt. Three of the locations are freely available for adventuring in, the rest have to be unlocked.

To open the haunted library, adventure in The Haunted Billiards Room until you have a pool cue and a handful of hand chalk. Equip the pool cue and use the hand chalk, then revisit The Haunted Billiards Room. Once you get the 'Minnesota Incorporeals' adventure, select 'Let the ghost greak' (picking 'Break' will give you 50 moxie). Next, pick 'Go for a solid' then 'Go for the 8-ball'. You will now have the Spookyraven library key.

Once you have access to The Haunted Library, you are able to open The Haunted Conservatory. Adventure in the library until you come across a bookcase. Pick 'Read "The Fall of the House of Spookyraven"', then 'Read "Chapter 2: Stephen and Elizabeth"'. You can now adventure in The Haunted Conservatory to get the 'Spookyraven gallery key'.

To repair the stairs and gain access to 'The Spookyraven Manor, Second Floor', click on the third book from the left on the top shelf of the bookcase in the 'Take a Look, it's in a Book!' adventure in The Haunted Library. You are now able to access two new areas in addition to another locked area.

To open The Haunted Ballroom, go to The Haunted Bedroom. Search the top drawer of the wooden nightstand, then search it's bottom drawer to find the Spookyraven ballroom key.

You can also find Lord Spookyraven's spectacles behind the ornate nightstand in The Haunted Bedroom. When equipped, they allow you to find a special class specific item under the mahogany nightstand. For Seal Clubbers or Turtle Tamers, you will find a tattered wolf standard or a tattered snake standard, respectively. For Pastamancers or Saucerors, you will find a 'English to A. F. U. E. Dictionary', and for Accordion Thieves or Disco Bandits, you will find bizarre illegible sheet music.

With the tattered wolf standard, adventure in The Haunted Gallery until you get the 'Out in the Garden' adventure. Choose the first knight, and you will get a new skill: 'Snarl of the Timberwolf'. If you have the tattered snake standard, pick the second knight, and you will the the 'Spectral Snapper' skill.
Mysticality classes with the English to A. F. U. E. Dictionary will need to adventure in The Haunted Library until they get the 'Take a Look, it's in a Book!' adventure. Choose the 'Read "Ancient Forbidden Unspeakable Evil, a Love Story"' option, then 'Read "Chapter 3: Twisted, Curdled, Corrupt Energy and You"'. Pastamancers will get the 'Fearful Fettucini' skill, while Saucerors will get the 'Scarysauce' skill.
Moxie classes can adventure in The Haunted Ballroom until they get the Curtains adventure, where they should choose "Investigate the organ". Accordion Thieves will get the 'Dirge of Dreadfulness' skill, and Disco Bandits will get the 'Tango of Terror' skill.
Most of these new skills involve dealing spooky damage to enemies.

Spookyraven Manor drops
The pile of dusty animal bones can be used to create a new familiar, the Misshapen Animal Skeleton.
The grouchy restless spirit can be combined with a clockwork sphere to create the Spooky Death Orb.

3) -Familiars-

To use any familiars you must first buy and then use a Familiar-Gro™ Terrarium.
Familiars will stop growing at 20lbs, but can temporarily reach 40+ with items and spells.
Familiars will level up when their number of kills equals the square of their next level. (e.g. 9 kills for level 3)
You can equip familiar specific items which typically increase its level/weight by 5. They can be found by winning in The Cake-Shaped Arena.
For arena info go to the arena section of this guide.
Leprechaun hatchling is fairly difficult to get. Visit the Spooky Forest with a ten-leaf clover to get the bowl of lucky charms. When you eat the bowl of lucky charms, there is a chance you will receive a leprechaun hatchling. If you do not get the hatchling, you must get another bowl of lucky charms and try again. When you do get the hatchling just "use" it to get the familiar. The Leprechaun gives you more meat at the end of battles. Its item is the meat detector.
The easiest familiar to get, the mosquito larvae is found in the spooky forest. Just "use" it to gain the mosquito. The Mosquito will occasionally drain the enemies hit points and give them to you. Its item is the hypodermic needle.
To get the levitating potato go to the daily dungeon and search the rooms, eventually you will find the potato. Once you have it, just "use" it. The potato will "trip up your foes". Its item is the many-eyed glasses.
They are the 23rd reward item for adventuring at the Shore. Once acquired just "use" it. It randomly selects one of these effects: Attack the enemy, attack you, give you 10 meat, give you MP, nothing or trips your opponent. Its item is the meatcar model.
First of all you need to visit the goatlet and get some sabre teeth. Then you need to go to menagerie level 1 (in the cobbs knob laboratory) or to the palindome and acquire a lime. You then combine the two to get a sabre toothed lime cub. Then just "use" that. The lime will attack in battle. Its item is the tiny shaker of salt.
Combine goats cheese from the goatlet and anticheese from the shore. You now have a goat. It will attack enemies. Its item is the prosthetic forehead.
The barrrnacle can be acquired by adventuring at the obligatory pirates cove. Once you have it, just "use" it. The barrrnacle slows the enemy. Its item is the sucky decal.
The spooky pirate skeleton is slightly tricky to make. First, go to the misspelled cemetary and get 8 skeleton bones. Then go to the obligatory pirates cove and get a pirates pelvis and a sunken chest. Then you must make a pirate skull, this is done by smart skull + disembodied brain = brainy skull, then brainy skull + eyepatch = pirate skull then "use" the pirate skull. This will combine all the items you have collected together to get the pirate skeleton. Then "use" the pirate skeleton in your inventory. The Pirate Skeleton helps in battle. Its item is the blundarrrbus.
Get 4 long skinny balloons from The "Fun" House in the plains. Then combine two to make a balloon helmet (long skinny balloon + long skinny balloon = balloon helmet). Then long skinny balloon + balloon helmet = balloon sword, and finally balloon sword + long skinny balloon = balloon monkey. Then "use" the monkey. It will electrocute enemies and restore your MP when it reaches level 10. Its item is the tiny balloon knife.
For a Stab Bat, you must get a batblade (from the palindome) and 2 bat wings (from the bat cave). Then you must combine the bat wing with the batblade. Once you've done that you have a one winged stab bat. Then from there combine the one winged stab bat with another bat wing, and bravo! You have a re-winged stab bat. Attacks in combat, but can damage you as well. Its item is the shock collar.
To get the blood faced volleyball you must go to the hermit and get a volleyball. Then you must go to the sewer and get a seal tooth (This may take a while, it may be better to go to the mall). Then you must use the seal tooth (to get a bloody hand) and then use the volleyball. This should make a blood faced volleyball. The volleyball increases the number of stat points you gain at the end of battle. Its item is the palm-frond toupee.
To get the baby gravy fairy you must cook a knob mushroom (can be found in knob goblin kitchens) with a fairy gravy (found in haiku dungeon) to get a pregnant mushroom. The Gravy Fairy will get you more items at the end of battle. Its item is the eye-pod.
The ghuol whelp is easy to get. First go to the misspelled cemetary and find a ghuol egg, then go to the spooky forest and find some Spooky-Gro fertilizer and then combine the two. The Ghuol Whelp eats the corpses of defeated enemies to replenish your health and MP. Its item is the tiny knife and fork.
Can be made by using a star chart with 6 Stars and 4 Lines. Deals damage and drains MP, giving the MP to you. Its item is the magnifying glass.
Received by completing the Strange Leaflet quest. The Grue hits for significant damage when the moons are dark. Its item is the moonglasses.
Created by cooking 4 cocoa eggshell fragments together into two large cocoa eggshell fragments and then into a cocoa egg. Use the cocoa egg. The Cocoabo will occasionally recover HP/MP, do damage, confuse the enemy or scavenge meat. Its item is the chocolate spurs.
Mix brine and vinegar together to make briney vinegar, which you then mix with dill to make dill brine. Mix a cucumber and the dill brine to make a spectral pickle, and cook the spectral pickle with a Skewer to make a Ghost Pickle On a Stick. In combat, the pickle uses a poking attack to do damage. The Ghost pickle also has a acid attack, which lowers the level of its target. Its item is the skewer-mounted razor blade. The ingredients for this familiar spawn only in The Spectral Pickle Factory, which appears very rarely.
Found in the The Dungeons of Doom in town. It will attack enemies in battle. Occasionally the baby killer bee feeds you royal jelly, increasing your stats while subtracting one HP. Its item is the brass stinger.
Must buy a Dark Jill-O-Lantern from the Mr. Store and use it to get this familiar. Its item is the 100-Watt bulb.
You must buy a hand turkey outline for one Mr. Accessory from the Mr. Store. It attacks like a goat and increases the amount of meat you find after a battle. Its item is the candied yam pinky ring.
You must buy a coffee sprite from the Mr. Store for 2 Mr. Accessories to get this familiar. It increases the amount of meat and items you find. Its item is the miniature espresso maker.
Must buy a Cheshire Bitten from the Mr. Store. It increases the amount of meat and stat points you get from a battle. Its item is the smile-sharpening stone.
Buy a crimbo elfling from the Mr. Store. Will attack like a lime and will also increase the chance of getting items from a battle. Its item is the dental pliers. It is December's Familiar-of-the-Month.
Buy an orphan baby yeti from the Mr. Store. It deals damage and drains MP. Its item is the penguin-smacking club. It is the January Familiar-of-the-Month.
Buy a silk garter snake from the Mr. Store. It will fight, entangle and steal meat from your enemies. Its item is the black velvet choker. It is February's Monthly Special.
Use a small Crimbo Pressie. It can attack, stun, steal meat and steal MP. Its item is the menorette.
Use an emo roe. The emo roe appeared at the Mr. Store on April 1 only, as an April Fool's joke. It slows and trips your enemies like the barrrnacle and potato do. Its item is the gazing shoes.
Use a personal raindrop. It has several random effects such as: attacking the enemy, attack you, restoring HP, restoring MP, or buffing stats. Its item is the rainbow tie.
Combine a poultrygeist and an irate sombrero together. Use the resulting hovering sombrero. Both these items are available from the South of the Border location. It acts similarly to a volleyball, increasing stat gains from combat. Its item is the tiny maracas.
Use a deflated inflatable dodecapede purchased from the Mr. Store in June. Will attack in combat, but will become less powerfull as it gets bigger. Its item is the toy six-seater hovercraft. It is Junes Familiar-of-the-Month.
Combine two leaflets to form a leaf. Then combine the leaf with maple syrup. Use the resulting maple leaf to get the familiar. All the components required are available in Little Canadia. It attacks and restores MP. It's item is the tiny Mountie hat.
Use the supertinkerer to combine the clockwork spine, clockwork claws and clockwork key together to form a deactivated MicroMechaMech. See the Supertinkerers section for more info. It attacks your enemies. Its item is the targeting chip.
Cook the clockwork endoskeleton and grapefruit together to form an unwound clockwork grapefruit. It attacks (might have other abilities). It's item is the false eyelashes.
Use the pregnant frozen mushroom given to you by Mayor Zapruder as reward for the Summon a Mushroom Familiar quest. It will attack enemies and increase item drops by 2.5% per pound. Its item is the iced-out bling, which is not available at the arena. To acquire this familars item, you need to complete Mayor Zapruders quest at least three times to get all the Gravy fairy familiars. Once you have all three familiars, completing Mayor Zapruders quest yet again will give you a Gravy fairy familiar item.
Use the pregnant stinky mushroom given to you by Mayor Zapruder as reward for the Summon a Mushroom Familiar quest. It will attack enemies and increase item drops by 2.5% per pound. Its item is the limburger biker boots, which is not available at the arena. To acquire this familars item, you need to complete Mayor Zapruders quest at least three times to get all the Gravy fairy familiars. Once you have all three familiars, completing Mayor Zapruders quest yet again will give you a Gravy fairy familiar item.
Use the pregnant flaming mushroom given to you by Mayor Zapruder as reward for the Summon a Mushroom Familiar quest. It will attack enemies, increase item drops by 2.5% per pound and occasionally produce mushrooms. Its item is the flaming glowsticks, which is not available at the arena. To acquire this familars item, you need to complete Mayor Zapruders quest at least three times to get all the Gravy fairy familiars. Once you have all three familiars, completing Mayor Zapruders quest yet again will give you a Gravy fairy familiar item.
Purchased from the Mr. Store. Increases the ammount of stats and items you get after a battle but consumes MP doing it. Its item is the tiny nose-bone fetish, which reduces its MP cost by 2-4. It is augusts familiar of the month.
Purchase a doppleshifter egg from the Mr. Store. Will assume the shape of your other familiars at random. Its item is the tiny makeup kit.
Purchase a calm attention-deficit demon from the Mr. Store. It increases the drop rate of meat and items from monsters. Its item is the attention spanner.
Purchase a unwound cymbal-playing monkey from the Mr. Store. It provides more meat and stat gains from battles. Its item is the funky brass fez.
Purchase a miniscule temporal rip from the Mr. Store. It will disrupt and slow enemies during combat. Occasionally gives extra adventures. Its item is 1.21 jigawatts.
December 2005's familiar of the month. Purchased from the Mr. Store. Attacks enemies and sometimes buffs you. Its item is the metal mandible.
Have Uncle Crimbo combine an eye and a block to create a pet rock. It sits motionless. It does not participate in the Arena. In short, it does nothing. You can obtain its item, the pet rock "Snooty" disguise, by using the Summon Hilarious Objects skill.
Have Uncle Crimbo combine 2 eyes, 4 stuffings and 2 felts into a teddy bear. It will sometimes jump in front of attacks, blocking them. However, each attack it blocks appears to reduce its experience by one point. It is thought that the bear will only block attacks when its experience level is greater the damage done. Its item is the teddy bear sewing kit.
Zap a yo-yo to create a sleeping snowy owl. It attacks in combat. Its item is the Pretty Predator Clawicure Kit.
You first need to combine a clockwork sphere, an enchanted eyepatch, a zombie pineal gland, a glowing red eye, and a cold ninja mask together to make a ninja pirate zombie robot head. Then collect: a clockwork spine, a cheap toaster, four pine tars, eight skeleton bones, a clockwork claw, a Chest of the Bonerdagon, two spiked femurs, two disembodied brains, two clockwork sheets, frigid ninja stars, teeny-tiny ninja stars, a star throwing star, an icy-hot katana and a Blundarrrbus. Once you have collected these items, use the ninja pirate zombie robot head and the Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot will assemble itself. This familiar restores HP/MP, attacks, stuns, collects meat and sometimes gives toast. Its item is the rhesus monkey.
Cook a sleazy fairy gravy (cook pr0n legs and fairy gravy) and an oily golden mushroom to get a pregnant oily golden mushroom. To get an oily golden mushroom, You must trade a gloomy black mushroom to A Suspicious-Looking Guy on The Wrong Side of the Tracks. Increases item drops and does sleaze damage. Its item is the hot pink lipstick, which drops in the Sleezy Back Alley when you have the sleazy gravy fairy as your familiar.
Use a pregnant gloomy black mushroom. Increases item drops and does damage. Its item is the miniature carton of clove cigarettes. To get the clove cigarettes, you must defeat Felonia, Queen of the Spooky Gravy Fairies, with a Spooky Gravy Fairy as your familiar. To get a pregnant gloomy black mushroom you must cook a spooky fairy gravy and a gloomy black mushroom. Gloomy black mushroom must be grown in the mushroom farms. Here is an example plot:

• The breeding of frozen mushrooms and spooky mushrooms into a gloomy black mushroom will only occur when both moons are completely dark.
• Grown frozen mushrooms and spooky mushrooms will not mate until the moons are dark. Before then they will just sit there.
• According to this site, June 17 is the next day during which both moons will be dark.
• On day four, the two warm mushrooms indicated with *'s must be removed.
• On day five, all but two frozen spores must be removed, and three spooky spores must be planted.

Day 1 Day 2 Day 3Day 4 (remove asterisked) Day 5a (remove asterisked) Day 5b (plant 3 spooky spores)Day 6 Day 7 (Dark moons) Day 8

knoll knob spooky spooky knob knoll	knoll knob spooky spooky knob knoll	cool warm pointy warm warm pointy warm cool
cool warm pointy *warm* *warm* pointy warm cool	*frozen* *stinky* frozen *flaming* *flaming* *frozen* *stinky* frozen	spooky frozen spooky spooky frozen
spooky frozen spooky spooky frozen	gloomy gloomy gloomy gloomy gloomy gloomy	gloomy gloomy gloomy gloomy gloomy gloomy

It is March 2006's familiar of the month and can be purchased from the Mr. Store as a March hat. Each battle, it does one of several things: It can increase stat gains, it can attack, it can increase meat drops or it can increase item drops. When it stops to wind its watch, you will gain one extra turn next rollover. This occurs about every 15 rounds of battle, less if you have its item, which is the miniature dormouse. The wild hare will also prevent you from getting the "beaten up" status when you lose in combat, consuming one adventure in the process.
Obtained by using the skill Summon Hilarious Objects, which is obtained by using McPhee's Grimoire of Hilarious Object Summoning, which could be purchased in the Mr. Store in April 2006. It attacks enemies in combat. Its item is the diamond-studded fronts.
May 2006's familiar of the month can be purchased at the Mr. Store as a homeless hobo spirit. It increases the amount of stats gain at the end of battle and when given alcohol, restores MP. Its item is the weegee sqouija, which makes alcohol more effective in enchancing the spirit hobo's ability.
June 2006's familiar of the month can be purchased at the Mr. Store. It attacks every round. It also drops up to five Astral Mushrooms a day, which when eaten, give the Half-Astral. The Half-Astral lasts for five turns and allows the "A Journey to the Center of Your Mind" adventures. Its item is the badger badge, which gives +5% To Astral Mushroom Drops.
August 2006's familiar of the month. When the comma chameleon eats a piece of familiar equipment, it will mimic whatever familiar that equipment belonged to for 40-50 turns. It has no item of it's own. In The Cake-Shaped Arena, you can only play the Hide and Seek game, but every other win, you get a random piece of familiar equipment.
Can be obtained by using a dusty animal skull (Combine a dusty animal cranium and dusty animal jawbone) while having at least one of each of the 98 other dusty bones. The dusty bones and skull parts can be acquired by using a 'pile of dusty animal bones' found in the The Haunted Conservatory in the Spookyraven Manor. The misshapen animal skeleton deals spooky damage and delevels enemies? Its item is the bone collar.
Combine a Clockwork sphere and a grouchy restless spirit to form a scary death orb. The orb will attack either you or your enemy in combat. Its item is the tuning fork, which makes the orb attack you less often. The grouchy restless spirit can be found in The Haunted Bedroom, inside Spookyraven Manor. The clockwork sphere must be made using supertinkering.
Use a towel until it is folded into a makeshift crane and use the crane. The origami towel crane absorbs some attacks from your enemy and can also interfere with their actions. Its item is the can of starch.

4) -Tattoos/Outfits-

The painter is on The Wrong Side Of The Tracks in The Dirt-Walled Hovel of The Pretentious Artist. You must complete his quest first. To get a tattoo, wear an item set then visit the painter. Once you have been given the tattoos by the painter, you can manage them from your account settings. The Tattoos: Pixel Sword, Pixel Hat and Pixel Pants. Wearing this outfit increases your damage in the 8-bit world.
Equip the colored-light "necklace", can of fake snow and a tree skirt. Players were given a single one of these items on December 25, 2005.
Wear the clockwork hat, clockwork trench coat and clockwork pants
Wear the Bow Tux Outfit (bowler, bow staff and bowlegged pants). This outfit gives +5 to all stats when worn.
Wear the Bugbear Costume (Bugbear Bungguard and Bugbear Beanie).
Visit the painter without any items on. Can be repeated after ascension.
Wear the Cloaca-Cola Uniform (Cloaca-Cola helmet, Cloaca-Cola fatigues, and Cloaca-Cola shield).
Crimbo Sword, Crimbo Hat and Crimbo Pants.
Wear the Dyspepsi-Cola Uniform (Dyspepsi-Cola helmet, Dyspepsi-Cola fatigues, and Dyspepsi-Cola shield).
Wear the Cerebral Cloche, Cerebral Crossbow and Cerebral Culottes.
Wear the eXtreme Cold-Weather Gear (eXtreme Mittens, eXtreme Scarf and Snowboarder Pants).
wolf mask and Furry Pants.
gnauga hide chaps, Gnauga hide buckler, and gnauga hide whip
Equip a grass hat, grass blade, and grass skirt to get the egg tattoo.
Wear the Filthy Hippy Disguise (filthy corduroys and filthy knitted dread sack).
Wear the Hot and Cold Running Ninja Suit (ninja hot pants, Cold Ninja Mask, Icy-Hot Katana).
Wear the Knob Goblin Elite Outfit (Knob Goblin Elite Polearm, Knob Goblin Elite Helm and Knob Goblin Elite Pants).
Wear the Knob Goblin Harem Girl outfit (Knob Goblin harem pants and Knob Goblin harem veil).
Drink martinis until you receive the tattoo.
Wear the Mining Gear (7-Foot Dwarven Mattock, Miner's Pants and Miner's Helmet).
Wear the OK Lumberjack Outfit (balaclava, los chinos, and disbelief suspenders)
Wear the Frat Boy Ensemble (Orcish cargo shorts, Orcish baseball cap and the homoerotic frat-paddle).
Wear the Swashbuckling Getup (swashbuckling pants, stuffed shoulder parrot and an eyepatch).
Wear the Radio Free Regalia (Radio Free Foil, Radio Free Baseball Cap and Radio Free Pants) The items in this outfit are not found normally, but given out if you listen to Radio KoL.
Wear the Star Garb (star hat, star pants and star buckler). Wearing the Star Garb gives +7 to all stats.
Wear the makeshift turban, makeshift skirt and makeshift cape. Wearing this outfit decreases your moxie by 12.
Wear the time trappings (time trousers, time sword, and time helmet). Wearing the complete set adds an extra +3 adventures per day.
Wear the Yendorian Finery (cornuthaum, ring of aggravate monster and vorpal blade).
Open the letter from King Ralph after ascending once and this tattoo will be available.

5) -Effects-

*Note that the association between effect and type of ! potion is random for each player. Effect name How to get the effect Effect's effect Duration Effects from items Intrinsic effects from equipment Skills & buffs (Note than Accordion Thieves can increase their buff length by equipping a Rock 'n' Roll Legend) --> Other

Antsy in your Pantsy	Use some maple syrup	+5 Moxie, 4+ Mox, +4 Mys	5
Arse-a'fire	Drink a Arse-a'fire elixir	Triples muscle	5
Black Tongue	Use a black snowcone	All tongue effects	20
Bloody Hand	Use a baby seal tooth	Bloody Hand	3
Blue Tongue	Use a blue snowcone	+25% items drops in combat	20
Butt-Rock Hair	Use a can of hair spray	+15% moxie	3
Canadianity	Drink a White Canadian	Change "out" to "oot" and put "eh?" on the end of your sentences in chat.	3
Chalky Equality	Drink a potion of chalky equality	Mysticality and moxie become equal to base muscle	5
Clean-Shaven	Use the shaving cream	+5 Moxie	5
Confused	Eat a herb brownie	-30% mysticality	5
Confused	Drink a ! potion*	-30% mysticality	20
Confused	Use some Senior Mints	-30% mysticality	5
Confused	Eat a Now and Earlier	-30% mysticality	5
Dill-Tastic	Drink a dill potion	+15 all stats	5
Dwarven Hardiness	Eat dwarf bread	+5 muscle	5
Egg-cellent Vocabulary	Use a yellow polka-dot oyster egg or a yellow plastic oyster egg	+10% moxie	20
Egg-headedness	Use a yellow paisley oyster egg or a yellow plastic oyster egg	+10% mysticality	20
Egg-stortionary Tactics	Use a black paisley, black polka-dot, or black striped oyster egg	Monsters drop more Meat (~+50%)	20
Egg-stra Arm	Use a yellow striped oyster egg or a yellow plastic oyster egg	+10% muscle	20
Eggs-tra Sensory Perception	Use an off-white paisley, off-white polka-dot, or off-white striped oyster egg	Monsters drop more items (~+50%)	20
Embarrassed	Use a patchouli incense stick	-30% moxie	5
Engorged Weapon	Eat some Meleegra™ pills	Increase melee potency	5
Equilibrium	Use equilibrium juice	Muscle and moxie become equal to base mysticality	5
Extreme Muscle Relaxation	Use Mick's IcyVapoHotnessRub	+25% muscle	10
Eye of the Lihc	Eat a Lihc eye pie	Spooky protection	5
Far Out	Use a patchouli incense stick	+1 mysticality	5
Flower Power	Eat a flower petal pie or drink a shot of flower schnapps	+20% all stats	3
Fresh Scent	Use deodorant	You encounter monsters less frequently	10
Goofball Withdrawal	Happens the day after the Hopped Up on Goofballs effect ends	Halves all stats (taking more goofballs will cause it to go away)	100
Gothy	Use spooky lipstick or spooky eyeliner	+20 mys, -10 mus, -10 mox	10
Gr8tness	Use a potion of temporary gr8tness	Doubles all stats	5
Grapefruit Power	Use grapefruit juice of powerful power	+50% to all stats	5
Green Tongue	Use a green snowcone	+5 familiar level	20
Hennaliciousness	Use a henna tattoo	Regenerates 10 MP a turn	5
Hernia!	Use the Mafia Aria while not wearing a support cummerbund	-70% muscle	5
Hippy Stench	Use reodorant	You encounter monsters more frequently	10
Hombre Muerto Caminando	Use a marzipan skull	?	5
Hopped Up on Goofballs	Use goofballs	+20% muscle and +20% moxie (The 7th time you use goofballs, you permanently lose 20 of each stat point. The 8th time you lose 25, and so on.)	10
Izchak's Blessing	Drink a ! potion*	+25% moxie	10
Knob Goblin Lust Frenzy	Use the Knob Goblin Love Potion	+2 moxie (but permanent -15 muscle subpoints)	5
Knob Goblin Perfume	Use the Knob Goblin Perfume	You smell like a Knob Goblin Harem Girl	1
Lemon Enlightenment	Use a cosmic lemonade	Doubles mysticality	5
Macho Profundo	Use the Mafia Aria while wearing a support cummerbund	+60% muscle and +60% moxie	5
Maraschino Moxiosity	Use a maraschino moxiosity potion	Doubles base moxie	5
Missing Fingers	Use a Knob Goblin Firecracker (while not in combat)	-3 muscle	3
Mysteriously Handsome	Drink a handsomeness potion	+5% moxie	5
Mystic Pickleness	Eat some pickle-flavored chewing gum	+5 mysticality, -5 muscle	5
Object Detection	Drink a ! potion*	Increases the number of items you find?	10
Olive Drabness	Use a drab potion	Muscle becomes equal to base mysticality	5
Orange Appeal	Use an orangish aphrodisiac	Doubles base moxie	5
Orange Tongue	Use a orange snowcone	Increases stats gained like a 10lbs volleyball does	20
Papowerful!	Use a papotion of papower	Doubles base mysticality	5
Poisoned	Use a marzipan skull	?	5
Popping Stomach	Use Rock Pops	Drinking a Dyspepsi-Cola with this effect active causes your stomach to explode and you getting Beaten Up status
Purple Tongue	Use a purple snowcone	Restores ~20 HP/MP each victory	20
Rainy Soul Miasma	Use a thin black candle or picture of a dead guy's girlfriend	+10 muscle, +10 mysticality, and -5 moxie	10
Rainy Soul Miasma	Use a picture of a dead guy's girlfriend	+10 muscle, +10 mysticality, and -5 moxie	1
Red Tongue	Use a red snowcone	+25% meat drops in combat	20
Sharp Weapon	Use a Knob Goblin Sharpening Spray	+5 melee damage	5
Sleepy	Use a decorative fountain	-30% muscle	1
Sleepy	Drink hippy herbal tea	-30% muscle	5
Sleepy	Drink a ! potion*	-30% muscle	20
Spicey Limeness	Eat some lime-and-chile-flavored chewing gum	+5 moxie, -5 muscle	5
Spicey Mouth	Eat some jabañero-flavored chewing gum	+5 mysticality, -5 moxie	5
Spiky Hair	Use super-spiky hair gel	Increased chance of critical hit	5
Steroid Boost	Use Knob Goblin Steroids	+2 muscle (but permanent -15 moxie subpoints)	5
Sticky Hands	Use some pine tar	Reduce fumble frequency	30
Strange Mental Acuity	Drink a ! potion*	+25% mysticality	10
Strawberry Alarm	Drink an alarming strawberry juice	Muscle and mysticality become equal to base moxie	5
Strength of Ten Ettins	Drink a ! potion*	+25% muscle	10
Sugar Rush	Eat a Tasty Fun Good Rice Candy or use a marzipan skull	+1 muscle and +1 moxie	5
Sugar Rush	Eat an Angry Farmer Candy	+1 muscle and +1 moxie	10
Sugar Rush	Eat a Now and Earlier	+5% Mus, +5% Mox, -10% Mys	5
Tamarind Torment	Eat some tamarind-flavored chewing gum	+5 muscle, -5 moxie	5
Teleportitis	Encounter a Q in the Enormous Greater-Than Sign	Randomly teleport to a low-level area when you try to adventure	5
Teleportitis	Drink a ! potion*	Randomly teleport to a low-level area when you try to adventure	10
Temporary Lycanthropy	Use the Blood of the Wereseal	Base muscle is multiplied by the sum of the moons' fullness percentage	10
The Wrath of Grapes	Use wrath serum	Doubles muscle	5
Ticking Clock	Use a cheap wind-up clock	Increases combat initiative?	10
Tingly Biceps	One of three possible random effects when you use a phonics down	+5 muscle	3-5
Tingly Elbows	One of three possible random effects when you use a phonics down	+5 moxie	3-5
Tingly Wrists	One of three possible random effects when you use a phonics down	+5 mysticality	3-5
Tomato Smoothness	Use a tomato smoothie	Moxie and mysticality swap	5
Uncertain	Use a probability potion	Your muscle and moxie randomly increases/decreases	10
Wussiness	Use a wussiness potion	-3 muscle	3
1337p4n7Z	Equip 1337 7r0uZ0RZ	+6 muscle, -3 moxie	∞
Chapped Legs	Equip leather chaps	-2 muscle, +4 moxie	∞
Complete Delusion	Equip wolf mask	+4 muscle, +5 moxie	∞
Draggin' Balls	Equip a Draggin' Ball Hat	-3 muscle, +6 moxie	∞
Free Bird	Equip Radio Free Pants	+20 mysticality	∞
Radio Head	Equip a Radio Free Baseball Cap	+20 moxie	∞
Red Neck	Equip a mesh cap	+4 muscle, -2 moxie	∞
Shiny Happy Weapon	Equip a Radio Free Foil	+20 muscle	∞
Sleeping with the Fishes	Equip cement shoes	Improves the recovery effect of sleep	∞
Aloysius' Antiphon of Aptitude	Accordian Thief buff	Increases stat gains in combat by 3 (1 of each stat.)	5/15
Ancestral Disapproval	Buy a mysticality boost from your clan	+10% mysticality	5/10/15
Astral Shell	Turtle Tamer buff	Reduces damage taken in combat	5
Brawnee's Anthem of Absorption	Accordion Thief buff	Reduces damage taken in combat by 40	5/15
Cletus' Canticle of Celerity	Accordion Thief buff	Improves chance of acting first and chance of succesfully fleeing by 20%	5/15
Disco State of Mind	Disco Bandit buff (Disco Aerobics)	+2 moxie	5
Elemental Saucesphere	Sauceror buff	Protects you from the elements (fire, cold, stench and spookiness)	10
Empathy	Turtle Tamer buff	+5 familiar level	10
Enraged	Buy a muscle boost from your clan	+10% muscle	5/10/15
Fat Leon's Phat Loot Lyric	Accordion Thief buff	Increases the item drop rates from monsters by 20%	5/15
Ghostly Shell	Turtle Tamer buff	Reduces damage taken in combat	5	Hoojiwat's Hymn of Healthiness	Accordion Thief buff	+20% maximum HP	5/15
Jabañero Saucesphere	Sauceror buff	Enemies that attack you get damaged	10
Jackasses' Symphony of Destruction	Accordion Thief buff	Increases melee damage by 12	5/15
Jalapeño Saucesphere	Sauceror buff	Enemies that attack you suffer some damage	10
Leash of Linguini	Pastamancer buff	+5 familiar level	10
Magical Mojomuscular Melody	Accordion Thief buff	+30 maximum MP	5/15
Mariachi Mood	Accordion Thief buff (Moxie of the Mariachi)	+1 moxie and +8 maximum HP	5
Moxious Madrigal	Accordion Thief buff	+10 moxie	5/15
Ode to Booze	Accordion Thief buff	+1-4 Adventures for every alcoholic drink consumed	5/15
Pasta Oneness	Pastamancer buff (Manicotti Meditation)	+2 mysticality	5
Patience of the Tortoise	Turtle Tamer buff	+1 muscle and +8 maximum HP	5
Polka of Plenty	Accordion Thief buff	Monsters drop more Meat	5/15
Power Ballad of the Arrowsmith	Accordion Thief buff	+10 muscle	5/15
Psalm of Pointiness	Accordion Thief buff	Damages enemies that attack you	5/15
Rage of the Reindeer	Seal Clubber buff	+10% muscle and +10 melee damage	5
Reptilian Fortitude	Turtle Tamer buff	+30 maximum HP	5
Saucemastery	Sauceror buff (Sauce Contemplation)	+1 mysticality and +8 maximum HP	5
Seal Clubbing Frenzy	Seal Clubber buff	+2 muscle	5
Springy Fusilli	Pastamancer buff	+40% combat initiative	10
Stevedave's Shanty of Superiority	Accordion Thief buff	10% bonus to all stats	5/15
Tenacity of the Snapper	Turtle Tamer buff	Increases your combat damage	5
Whitened Teeth	Buy a moxie boost from your clan	+10% moxie	5/10/15
And Your Family, Too	The Don's Special on your familiar	-10 familiar level	10
Apathy	Attacked by an apethetic lizardman	reduces stats	10
Beaten Up	Reach zero hitpoints	All stats halved	3
Beaten Up	Mob hit or drinking Dyspepsi-Cola after eating Rock Pops	All stats halved	10
Broken Knees	The Don's Special (a mob hit)	-30% muscle	10
Corroded Weapon	Acid blob attack in the Dungeons of Doom	Decrease combat damage	5
Gnawed-Off Arm	Can occur during a St. Sneaky Pete's Day Stupor	-5 muscle	5
poisoned	Various	-25% all stats	10
Sunburned	Can occur while adventuring in the Palindome	-2 muscle and -2 moxie	3
The Smile of Mr. A.	Get blessed by a Golden Mr. Accessory	+15 all stats	40

6) -Recipes-

1. Combining Recipes
2. Cooking Recipes
3. Mixing Recipes
4. Smithing Recipes
5. Jewelrymaking Recipes
6. Supertinkering Recipes

Combining Recipes 31337 Scroll: (Gives a stat scroll and a Hermit Script)
30669 Scroll and 668 Scroll
5-Alarm Saucepan:
heavy hot sauce and saucepan 64067 Scroll:
33398 Scroll and 30669 Scroll 64735 Scroll:
64067 Scroll and 668 Scroll 668 Scroll:
334 Scroll and 334 Scroll Abridged Dictionary:
Bridge and Dictionary Asshat: (Stench resistance)
Bum Cheek and Bum Cheek Badass Belt: (+5 all major stats)
Dragonbone Belt Buckle and Batskin Belt Balloon Helmet:
Long Skinny Balloon and long skinny balloon Balloon Monkey: (Familiar)
Balloon Sword and long skinny balloon Balloon Sword:
balloon helmet and long skinny balloon Barskin Tent:
Bar Skin and Wooden Stakes Bartender-In-The-Box: (Removes the adventure cost from mixing drinks)
Bartender-Skull-In-The-Box and Cocktailcrafting Kit Bartender Skull:
Brainy Skull and Beer Goggles bartender-skull-in-the-box:
Bartender Skull and Nothing-In-The-Box beanbag chair: (campground item - you can spend a turn to recover MP)
filthy knitted dread sack and beans Beer Goggles:
beer lens and beer lens Bitchin' Meat Car: (Makes the Shore area available for adventure)
Dope Wheels and Meat Engine Bjorn's Hammer:
seal-toothed rock and Seal Clubbing Club Box-In-The-Box:
Nothing-In-The-Box and box Box-In-The-Box-In-The-Box:
Nothing-In-The-Box-In-The-Box and box Bone Rattle:
Skeleton Bone and broken skull Bonerdagon necklace:
vertebra of the Bonerdagon and necklace chain Brainy Skull:
Smart Skull and Disembodied Brain Charrrm Bracelet: (+5 Moxie)
Charrrm and Hemp Bracelet Chef-In-The-Box: (Removes the adventure cost from cooking)
Chef-Skull-In-The-Box and E-Z Cook Oven™ Chef-Skull-In-The-Box:
Chef Skull and nothing-in-the-box Chef Skull:
Brainy Skull and chef's hat clockwork pirate skull:
clockwork sphere and enchanted eyepatch Cog And Sprocket Assembly:
Sprocket Assembly and cog Cottage:
Bowl Of Cottage Cheese and anticheese Detective Skull: (Displays the HP of enemies in battle)
gnoll lips and brainy skull Disco Banjo:
Stone Banjo and Disco Ball disembodied smile: (+2 spooky damage)
gnoll teeth and gnoll lips Dope Wheels:
Tires and Sweet Rims. enchanted eyepatch:
eyepatch and lihc eye Evil Golden Arches: (When placed in your campground it will enable you to order evil food once every day.)
evil golden arch and evil golden arch eXtreme nose ring: (+4 all stats)
stone of eXtreme power and piercing post Fertilized Ghuol Egg: (Familiar)
Ghuol Egg and Spooky-Gro fertilizer Full Meat Tank:
Empty Meat Tank and Meat Stack gnatwing earring: (+10 initiative)
gnatwing and piercing post Gnollish Autoplunger:
Gnollish Plunger and Meat Engine Gnoll-Toothed Necklace: (+5 muscle)
Gnoll Teeth and Necklace Chain Goat: (Familiar)
Goats Cheese and Anticheese heart of rock and roll:
big rock and Hot Buttered Roll Heavy Hot Sauce:
Big Rock and Jabanero Pepper Heavy Metal Sonata:
Drab Sonata and Chrome Ore Heavy Metal Thunderrr Guitarrr:
acoustic guitarrr and Chrome Ore Hosed Fishbowl:
Fishbowl and Fish Hose hosed tank:
fish hose and fishtank Icy-Hot Katana:
Hot Katana Blade and Icy Katana Hilt Intergalactic Rowboat: (Allows access to the Hole in the Sky area)
Quantum Egg and S.O.C.K Lifeless Meat Doll:
Meat Face and Wooden Figurine maid head:
brainy skull and maiden wig Makeshift SCUBA Gear:
Hosed Fisbowl and Fish Tank Meat Cowboy Hat:
Basic Meat Helmet and Whitesnake Skin Meat Engine:
Full Meat Tank and Cog And Sprocket Assembly Meat Face:
Dried Face and Fairy Gravy Meat Golem: (Reduces meat stolen from you in PvP)
Lifeless Meat Doll and Magicalness-In-A-Can Meat Maid: (Once used, this item adds +4 adventures a day)
maid head and meat maid body Meat Maid Body: (Formerly the Clockwork Maid, now modified)
Meat Engine and Frilly Skirt Meat Stack:
Meat From Yesterday and Fairy Gravy Mighty Bjorn Action Figure:
Action Figure Head and Action Figure Body ND:
Lowercase N and Heavy D NG:
Lowercase N and Original G ninja pirate zombie robot head:
pirate zombie robot head and cold ninja mask nothing-in-the-box:
Box and Spring Nothing-In-The-Box-In-The-Box:
Box-In-The-Box and Spring one-winged stab bat:
Bat Wing and Batblade oyster basket:
tisket and tasket Pasta Of Peril:
spaghetti with rock-balls and Pasta Spoon Phat Turquoise Bracelet: (+5 mysticality)
Hemp Bracelet and Phat Turquoise Bead pimpin' meat hat:
basic meat helmet and bling-bling Pirate Skull:
Brainy Skull and Eyepatch pirate zombie head:
clockwork pirate skull and zombie pineal gland pirate zombie robot head:
pirate zombie head and glowing red eye Present:
Wrapping Paper and box Pretty Bouquet: (Used in PvP, reduces attackers stats)
Pretty Flower and Pretty Flower (Pretty Flowers are what you get when you try to take meat in PvP against someone either without meat or with a meat golem.) Really Sticky Spider Web:
Spider Web and Spider Web Really Really Sticky Spider Web:
Really Sticky Spider Web and Really Sticky Spider Web Rewinged Stab Bat: (A familiar)
One Winged Stab Bat and Bat Wing Rock And Roll Legend: (50 Power, +7 Moxie for Accordion Thieves only, increases AT buff duration)
Heart Of Rock And Roll and Stolen Accordian Sabre-Toothed Lime Cub:
Sabre Teeth and Lime Seal Tooth Rock:
Seal Tooth and Big Rock Skeleton Key:
Skeleton Bone and Loose Teeth Spaghetti With Rock Balls:
Ravioli Hat and Big Rock Spooky Glove:
Spooky Gravy Fairy and Small Leather Glove Spooky Scarecrow: (Campgound item, reduces enemies stats)
Spooky Staff and Wooden Stakes Spooky Staff:
spooky shrunken head and spooky stick Sprocket Assembly:
Spring and Sprocket Stone Banjo:
Banjo Strings and Big Rock T-Bone Key: (Opens the locked orcish meat locker)
Crusty L Shaped Piece Of Metal and Rusty L Shaped Piece Of Metal Talisman O'Nam: (+1 all major stats and gives entry to the Palindome)
Snakehead Charrrm and Snakehead Charrrm tambourine:
tambourine bells and Gnollish Pie Tin Turtle Factory:
Big Rock and scroll of turtle summoning Turtleslinger:
Turtle Factory and Slingshot WA:
Ruby W and Metallic A Wand Of Nagamar:
WA and ND Wang: (Spell checks for you in chat)
WA and NG wholeberd:
halfberd and halfberd Cooking Recipes For information on the effects of food, goto http://www.lysator.liu.se/~jhs/KoL/effects/food.rxml
alarming strawberry juice: (muscle and mysticality set to moxie for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
strawberry and scrumptious reagent Arse-A'Fire Elixir: (+200% muscle for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
scrumptious reagent and Jabanero Pepper asparagus stir-fry:
stalk of asparagus and secret blend of herbs and spices bat haggis:
batgut and spices bat wing chow mein: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
bat wing stir-fry and dry noodles Bat Wing Kabob:
Bat Wing and skewer bat wing stir-fry:
bat wing and knob stir-fry bean burrito:
beans and flat dough Boring Spaghetti: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
dry noodles and tomato Boris's Key Lime:
Boris's Key and Lime Boris's Key Lime Pie:
Boris's Key Lime and Pie Crust Carob Brownies:
Carob Chunks and Uncle Jick's Brownie Mix Carob Chunk Cookies:
Carob Chunks and Wad Of Dough Chorizo Taco:
Uncooked Charizo and Taco Shell Clockwork Grapefruit:
clockwork endoskeleton and grapefruit cocoa egg:
large cocoa eggshell fragment and large cocoa eggshell fragment cool mushroom casserole:
cool mushroom and Gnollish casserole dish Cosmic Lemonade: (double mysticality for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this))
Scrumptious Reagent and Lemon cream of pointy mushroom soup:
pointy mushroom and glass of goat's milk delicious noodles: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
dry noodles and herbs delicious spicy noodles: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
dry noodles and secret blend of herbs and spices dill potion: (+15 all stats for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
dill and scrumptious reagent drab potion: (muscle set to mysticality for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
scrumptious reagent and olive Enchanted Bean Burrito:
Enchanted Bean and Flat Dough equilibruim potion: (muscle and moxie set to mysticality for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
scrumptious reagent and lime Fancy Schmany Cheese Sauce: (must be a sauceror to make this)
scrumptious reagent and Goats Cheese Fettucini Inconnu: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
Dry Noodles and Fancy Schmany Cheese Sauce flower petal pie:
pretty flower and pie crust ghuol-ear kabob:
Ghuol Ear and skewer ghuol egg quiche:
ghuol egg and pie crust Gnocchetti Di Nietzsche: (must be a skilled pastamancer to make this)
dry noodles and Himalayan Hidalgo sauce Goat Cheese Pizza:
Plain Pizza and Goats Cheese Grapefruit Juice Of Powerful Power: (+50% all stats for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
scrumptious reagent and grapefruit grue egg omelette:
grue egg and spooky mushroom Hell Broth: (must be a sauceror to make this)
scrumptious reagent and Hellion Cube Hell Ramen: (Increases all stats and adventures, must be a skilled pastamancer to make this)
dry noodles and Hell Broth Herb Brownies:
herbs and Uncle Jick's Brownie Mix Himalayan Hidalgo sauce: (must be a sauceror to make this)
Scrumptious Reagent and Knob Mushroom Hippy Herbal Tea:
Guano Coffee Cup and Herbs Insanely Spicy Bean Burrito:
Spicy Bean Burrito and Jabanero Pepper Insanely Spicy Enchanted Bean Burrito:
Spicy Enchanted Bean Burrito and Jabanero Pepper insanely spicy jumping bean burrito:
jabañero pepper + spicy jumping bean burrito Jarlsberg's Key Lime:
Jarlsberg's Key and Lime Jarlsberg's Key Lime Pie:
Jarlsberg's Key Lime and Pie Crust jumping bean burrito:
jumping beans and flat dough Knob sausage chow mein: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
Knob sausage stir-fry and dry noodles Knob sausage stir-fry:
Knob sausage and Knoll stir-fry Knob stir-fry:
Knob mushroom and secret blend of herbs and spices Knoll stir-fry:
Knoll mushroom and secret blend of herbs and spices large cocoa eggshell fragment:
cocoa eggshell fragment and cocoa eggshell fragment Lihc Eye Pie: (gives 5 turns of spooky protection)
Pie Crust and Lihc Eye Lucky Surprise Egg: (gives a tiny plastic figurine)
cocoa egg and ten-leaf clover maraschino moxiosity potion: (double moxie for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
cherry and scrumptious reagent menudo:
catgut and spices Mushroom Pizza:
Plain Pizza and Knob Mushroom olive stir-fry:
olive and secret blend of herbs and spices orangish aphrodisiac: (double moxie for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
scrumptious reagent and orange painful penne pasta: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
dry noodles and Jabanero Pepper papaya taco:
papaya and taco shell papotion of papower: (double mysticality for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
papaya and scrumptious reagent Pie Crust:
Gnollish Pie Tin and wad of dough Plain Pizza:
Flat Dough and Tomato potion of chalky equality: (must be a sauceror to make this)
cranberries and scrumptious reagent Potion Of Temporary Gr8ness: (Doubles all stats for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
Scrumptious Reagent and Gr8ps Pregnant Mushroom:
Fairy Gravy and Knob Mushroom pr0n chow mein: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
pr0n stir-fry and dry noodles Pr0n Cocktail:
Pr0n Legs and Catsup/Ketchup Pr0n m4nic0tti: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
Dry noodles and Pr0n legs Pr0n Stir-Fry:
Pr0n Legs and olive stir-fry rat appendix chow mein: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
rat appendix stir-fry and dry noodles rat appendix stir-fry:
rat appendix and spooky stir-fry rat appendix-kabob:
Rat Appendix and skewer rat scrapple:
ratgut and spices Ravioli Della Hippy: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
Dry Noodles and Wad Of Tofu Sauce Of The Ages: (must be a sauceror to make this)
Scrumptious Reagent and Knob Sausage Sausage Pizza:
Plain Pizza and Knob Sausage secret blend of herbs and spices:
herbs and spices shroomkabob:
Knoll mushroom and skewer Skewered Cat Appendix:
Cat Appendix and skewer sleazy fairy gravy:
pr0n legs and fairy gravy Sneaky Pete's Key Lime:
Sneaky Pete's Key and Lime Sneaky Pete's Key Lime Pie:
Sneaky Pete's Key Lime and Pie Crust Spaghetti With Skullheads: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
dry noodles and Sauce Of The Ages spectral pickle:
ghost cucumber and ghostly pickling solution Spicy Bean Burrito:
Bean Burrito and spices Spicy Enchanted Bean Burrito:
Enchanted Bean Burrito and spices spicy jumping bean burrito:
jumping bean burrito and spices spicy mushroom quesadilla:
warm mushroom and flat dough spicy noodles: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
dry noodles and spices spooky shroomkabob:
spooky mushroom and skewer spooky stir-fry:
spooky mushroom and secret blend of herbs and spices stuffed spooky mushroom:
spooky mushroom and goat cheese tofu casserole:
wad of tofu and Gnollish casserole dish tofu chow mein: (must be a trained pastamancer to make this)
tofu stir-fry and dry noodles tofu stir-fry:
wad of tofu and asparagus stir-fry Tomato Smoothie:(moxie set to mysticality for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
Scrumptious Reagent and Tomato White Chocolate Chip Cookies:
White Chocolate Chips and Wad Of Dough wrath serum: (double muscle for 5 turns, must be a trained sauceror to make this)
grapes and scrumptious reagent Mixing Recipes / Cocktail Crafting For information on the effects of booze, goto http://www.lysator.liu.se/~jhs/KoL/effects/booze.rxml
A Little Sump'm Sump'm: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
Martini and Little Paper Umbrella Bloody Beer:
Ice-Cold Beer and Tomato Bloody Mary:
Bottle Of Vodka and Tomato bodyslam:
skewered lime and tequila with training wheels calle de miel: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
magical ice cubes and margarita Cool mushroom wine:
Cool mushroom and mushroom fermenting solution cherry bomb:
old-fashioned and skewered cherry cranmopolitan:
vodka and cranberry and skewered cranberry dirty martini:
skewered jumbo olive and dry martini dry martini:
bottle of gin and jumbo olive dry vodka martini:
bottle of vodka and jumbo olive ducha de oro: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
little paper umbrella and tequila sunrise eggnog:
spiced rum and ghuol egg Especially salty dog:
Salty Dog and brine extra-spicy bloody mary:
Bloody Mary and Spices Fine Wine:
Fermenting Powder and Grapes Flaming mushroom wine:
Flaming mushroom and mushroom fermenting solution Flat mushroom wine:
warm mushroom and mushroom fermenting solution Fuzzbump: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
whiskey sour and coconut shell green beer: (can only be made on St. Sneaky Pete's Day)
ice-cold beer and ten-leaf clover Grog:
lime and bottle of rum grogtini:
skewered lime and grog horizontal tango: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
wine spritzer and little paper umbrella icy mushroom wine:
Frozen mushroom and mushroom fermenting solution knob mushroom wine:
Knob mushroom and mushroom fermenting solution knoll mushroom wine:
Knoll mushroom and mushroom fermenting solution Lumbering Jack:
Blatantly Canadian and bottle of whiskey margarita:
bottle of tequila and lemon Martini:
Bottle Of Gin and Olive monkey wrench:
grapefruit and bottle of rum ocean motion: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
coconut shell and monkey wrench old-fashioned:
cherry and bottle of whiskey Papaya Sling:
Bottle Of Gin and Papaya perpendicular hula: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
magical ice cubes and strawberry daiquiri Pink Pony: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
coconut shell and strawberry wine pointy mushroom wine:
pointy mushroom and mushroom fermenting solution redrum:
cranberries and bottle of rum rockin' wagon: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
vodka martini and magical ice cubes Roll In The Hay: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
whiskey and soda and little paper umbrella rum and cola:
bottle of rum and Dyspepsi-Cola Salty Dog:
Bottle Of Gin and Grapefruit sangria:
boxed wine and cherry sangria del diablo:
skewered cherry and sangria Screwdriver:
Bottle Of Vodka and Orange shot of flower schnapps:
fermenting powder and pretty flower Shot Of Grapefruit Schnapps:
Fermenting Powder and Grapefruit Shot Of Orange Schnapps:
Fermenting Powder and Orange Shot Of Tomato Schnapps:
Fermenting Powder and Tomato skewered cherry:
cherry and tiny plastic sword skewered cranberry:
cranberries and tiny plastic sword skewered lime:
lime and tiny plastic sword skewered jumbo olive:
jumbo olive and tiny plastic sword Slap And Tickle: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
Salty Dog and magical ice cubes Slip 'N' Slide: (must be a trained Disco Bandit to make this)
Screwdriver and coconut shell spiced rum:
spices and bottle of rum spooky mushroom wine:
spooky mushroom and mushroom fermenting solution stinky mushroom wine:
stinky mushroom and mushroom fermenting solution strawberry daiquiri:
bottle of rum and strawberry strawberry wine:
strawberry and boxed wine tequila sunrise:
bottle of tequila and orange tequila with training wheels:
bottle of tequila and lime vesper:
skewered jumbo olive and vodka dry martini Vodka And Cranberry:
Bottle Of Vodka and Cranberries vodka martini:
vodka and olive Whiskey And Cola:
Bottle Of Whiskey and Dyspepsi Cola whiskey and soda:
bottle of whiskey and soda water Whiskey Sour:
Bottle Of Whiskey and Lemon white Canadian:
Bottle Of Vodka and Glass Of Goats Milk wine spritzer:
soda water and boxed wineSmithing Recipes Asbestos Crossbow: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Asbestos Crossbow String and Asbestos Meat Stack
Asbestos Crossbow String: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Asbestos Ore and Crossbow String Asbestos Helmet Turtle: (80 power, heat resistance)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
Asbestos Ore and Helmet Turtle Asbestos Meat Stack: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Asbestos Ore and Dense Meat Stack Asbestos Staff: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Asbestos Big Stick and Asbestos Meat Stack Asbestos Stick: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Asbestos Ore and Big Stick Asbestos Sword: (100 power, +9 Muscle)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Asbestos Sword Hilt and Asbestos Meat Stack Asbestos Sword Hilt: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Asbestos Ore and Sword Hilt Basic Meat Crossbow:
Crossbow String and meat stack basic meat fez: (40 power)
tassel and basic meat helmet basic meat foon: (50 power, +2 mus, +3 damage)
foon and meat stack basic meat helmet:
helmet recipe and meat stack Basic Meat Pants:
Pants Kit and meat stack basic meat skirt / basic meat kilt:
skirt / kilt kit and meat stack basic meat spork: (40 power)
spork and meat stack Basic Meat Staff:
Big Stick and Meat Stack Basic Meat Sword:
Sword Hilt and Meat Stack bowlegged pants: (100 Power, +5 Moxie)
bow and basic meat pants bowler: (100 Power, +5 Muscle)
bow and basic meat helmet bow staff: (100 Power, +5 Mysticality, +3 damage)
bow and big stick Chrome Crossbow: (+3 adventures per day)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Chrome Crossbow String and Chrome Meat Stack Chrome Crossbow String: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Chrome Ore and Crossbow String Chrome Helmet Turtle: (120 power, +5 all stats)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
chrome ore and meaty helmet turtle Chrome Meat Stack: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Chrome Ore and Dense Meat Stack Chrome Staff: (+3 adventures per day)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Chrome Big Stick and Chrome Meat Stack Chrome Stick: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Chrome Ore and Big Stick Chrome Sword: (120 power, +3 adventures per day)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
sturdy sword hilt and Chrome Meat Stack Crimbo Hat:
Wrapping Paper and Helmet Recipe Crimbo Pants: (+30% Combat Speed)
Wrapping Paper and Pants Kit Crimbo Sword:
Wrapping Paper and Sword Hilt Dripping Meat Crossbow:
Basic Meat Crossbow and Catsup/Ketchup Dripping Meatstaff:
Basic Meat Staff and Catsup/Ketchup Dripping Meatsword:
Basic Meat Sword and Catsup/Ketchup fez of etymology: (120 Power, +7 moxie)
facsimile dictionary and basic meat fez Furry Pants: (must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
Furry Fur and Pants Kit furry skirt / furry kilt: (150 Power)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
skirt / kilt kit and furry fur gnauga hide buckler: (Damage Absorption +20, +3 all stats)
gnauga hide and buckler buckle gnauga hide chaps: (80 power, +30 damage absorption)
gnauga hide and pants kit gnauga hide skirt / gnauga hide kilt: (80 Power, Damage Absorption +30)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
skirt / kilt kit and gnauga hide gnauga hide whip: (20 power, +3% item drop rate)
gnauga hide and whip kit grass hat: (80 power, +10 MP)
fake plastic grass and helmet recipe grass blade: (80 power, +5 Damage)
fake plastic grass and sword hilt grass skirt: ( 80 power, +5 Mox)
fake plastic grass and skirt / kilt kit hippo skin buckler: (10% damage absorption, +5 muscle)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
hippopotamus skin and buckler buckle hippo whip: (20 power, +5 monster level)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
hippopotamus skin and whip kit Hippopotamus Pants: (+25 Max HP)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
hippopotamus skin and pants kit hippopotamus skirt / hippopotamus kilt: (130 Power, Max HP +25)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
skirt / kilt kit and hippopotamus skin Kentucky-Fried Meat Crossbow:
basic meat crossbow and Secret Blend Of Herbs And Spices Kentucky-Fried Meat Staff:
Basic Meat Staff and Secret Blend Of Herbs And Spices Kentucky-fried meat sword:
Basic Meat Sword and Secret Blend Of Herbs And Spices Linoleum Crossbow: (100 Power, Max HP/MP +10)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Linoleum Crossbow String and Linoleum Meat Stack Linoleum Crossbow String: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Linoleum Ore and Crossbow String Linoleum Helmet Turtle: (100 power, Maximum HP/MP +10)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
Linoleum Meat Stack and Helmet Turtle Linoleum Meat Stack: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Linoleum Ore and Dense Meat Stack Linoleum Staff: (100 Power, Max MP +20)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Linoleum Big Stick and Linoleum Meat Stack Linoleum Stick: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Linoleum Ore and Big Stick Linoleum Sword: (100 power, +20 Max HP)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Linoleum Sword Hilt and Linoleum Meat Stack Linoleum Sword Hilt: (must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
Linoleum Ore and Sword Hilt Meat Cowboy Hat:
Whitesnake Skin and Basic Meat Helmet Meatloaf Helmet:
Basic Meat Helmet and Catsup/Ketchup meaty helmet turtle: (70 Power)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
Dense Meat Stack and helmet turtle penguinskin mini-skirt / penguinskin mini-kilt: (120 Power, Combat Initiative +20%)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
skirt / kilt kit and penguin skin Penguin Shorts: (80 power, +20% initiative)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
penguin skin and pants kit penguin skin buckler: (10% damage absorption, +5 moxie)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
penguin skin and buckler buckle penguin whip: (20 power, +3% meat from combat)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
penguin skin and whip kit time helmet: (100 Power, +3 adv/day)
petrified time and helmet recipe time sword: (100 Power, +3 adv/day)
petrified time and sword hilt time trousers: (100 Power, +3 adv/day)
petrified time and pants kit Pimpin' Meat Hat:
Basic Meat Helmet and Bling Bling raspberry beret: (50 power hat, So-So Hot Resistance)
basic meat helmet and raspberry sequined fez: (80 power, +3 Mox)
basic meat fez and teeny-tiny ninja stars Sticky Meat Pants:
Basic Meat Pants and Really Really Sticky Spider Web sticky meat skirt / sticky meat kilt: (45 Power, Mox +3)
really really sticky spider web and basic meat skirt / basic meat kilt sword behind inappropriate prepositions: (120 power, +7 Mus, +5 adventures a day)
chrome sword and facsimile dictionary eXtreme meat crossbow: (60 power, +7 Mox)
Basic Meat Crossbow and stone of eXtreme power eXtreme Meat Staff: (60 power, +7 Mys)
Basic Meat Staff and stone of eXtreme power eXtreme Meat Sword: (60 power, +7 Mus)
Basic Meat Sword and stone of eXtreme power Yakskin Pants: (must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
Yak Skin and Pants Kit yak skin buckler: (10% damage absorption, +5 mysticality)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
yak skin and buckler buckle yakskin skirt / yakskin kilt: (140 Power, Max MP +25)(must be a trained Turtle Tamer to make this)
skirt / kilt kit and yak skin yak whip: (20 power, weakens opponent)(must be a trained Seal Clubber to make this)
yak skin and whip kit Jewelrymaking Recipes You need the jewelry-making pliers before you can begin creating jewerly. It will cost 3 adventures to make jewelry.
baconstone ring: (+5 Mys, +2 Mox, and +3 Mus)
ring setting and baconstone hamethyst ring: (+5 Mus, +2 Mys, +3 Mox)
ring setting and hamethyst porquoise ring: (+5 Mox, +2 Mus, and +3 Mys)
ring setting and porquoise porquoise eyebrow ring: (+5 Mox, +6 HP/MP)
piercing post and porquoise Baconstone Earring: (+5 Mys, +10 MP)
piercing post and baconstone hamethyst earring: (+5 Mus, +10 HP)
piercing post and hamethyst porquoise necklace: (+4 Mox, +10% meat from monsters)
necklace chain and porquoise baconstone pendant: (+4 Mys, +10 spell damage)
necklace chain and baconstone hamethyst necklace: (+4 Mus, +5 melee damage, +3 PvP fights per day)
necklace chain and hamethyst porquoise bracelet: (+4 Mox, never fumble)
hemp bracelet and porquoise baconstone bracelet: (+2 Mys, -1 MP per skill use)
hemp bracelet and baconstone hamethyst bracelet: (+3 Mus, 3x chance of Critical Hit)
hemp bracelet and hamethyst Supertinkering Recipes Requires access to the supertinkerer in the Gnomish Gnomads' Camp (must have a moxie sign).
clockwork thingamajig:
flange + cog + spring clockwork claws:
clockwork thingamajig + spring + sprocket clockwork rings:
clockwork thingamajig + flange + sprocket clockwork spine:
clockwork widget + cog + spring clockwork widget:
cog + flange + sprocket clockwork doohickey:
flange + spring + sprocket clockwork clockwise dome:
clockwork widget + flange + spring clockwork counterclockwise dome:
clockwork doohickey + cog + sprocket clockwork sphere:
clockwork clockwise dome + clockwork counterclockwise dome + clockwork key deactivated MicroMechaMech:
clockwork spine + clockwork claws + clockwork key clockwork endoskeleton:
clockwork claws + clockwork counterclockwise dome + clockwork key clockwork trench coat:
clockwork spine + clockwork sheet + clockwork key clockwork sheet:
clockwork doohickey + flange + cog clockwork pants:
clockwork sheet + clockwork rings + clockwork key clockwork hat:
clockwork clockwise dome + clockwork rings + clockwork key clockwork maid: (+8 adventures per day, replaces the meat maid)
clockwork maid head + meat maid body clockwork maid head:
clockwork sphere + maiden wig clockwork bartender-in-the-box:
clockwork bartender-head-in-the-box + cocktailcrafting kit clockwork bartender-head-in-the-box:
clockwork bartender head + nothing-in-the-box clockwork bartender head:
clockwork sphere + beer goggles clockwork chef-in-the-box:
clockwork chef-head-in-the-box + E-Z Cook Oven™ clockwork chef-head-in-the-box:
clockwork chef head + nothing-in-the-box clockwork chef head:
clockwork sphere + chef's hat clockwork detective skull:
clockwork sphere + gnoll lips

7) -Trophies-Trophies are purely for display in your campground. In addition to the following requirements, you will need 10,000 meat. 100 Pound Load:
The total weight of your familiars must be 100lbs unbuffed. This weight calculator comes in handy when determining total weight. 300 Pound Load:
The total weight of your familiars must be 300lbs. Black Hole Terrarium:
The total weight of your familiars must be 500lbs. 99 Red Balloons:
Use 99 red balloons (use multiple menu). Red Balloons can be purchased from The Gift Shop after your 26th ascension. Little Boat:
Take 100 Trips at the Shore. Best Meal of My Life:
Consume 60 White Citadel burgers, 10 White Citadel fries, 4 Cherry Cloaca Colas and 4 Diet Cloaca Colas. Big Boat:
Take 1000 Trips at the Shore. Boss Boss:
Defeat the Boss Bat, Goblin King, Baron von Ratsworth, and Bonerdagon with The Super-Secret Canadian Mind-Control Device set to 11. Bouquet of Hippes:
Eat 420 herb brownies (cook herbs and Uncle Jick's Brownie Mix together). Brass Bowling Trophy Trophy:
During the strange leaflet quest you come across a house with a fireplace. Light the fireplace then examine the fireplace. You should see a trophy. Take it. There appears to be an element of randomness in that not everyone gets the trophy every time. Der Toastdieb:
Steal toast in PvP. Disgusting Cocktail:
Drink 5 tomato daiquiris (sometimes spit out by an exploding bartender after trying cocktail craft too many items at once). Easy Come Easy Go:
Discard pretty flower from inventory. Failure to Communicate:
Eat 50 Lucky Surprise Eggs (cook cocoa egg and ten-leaf clover together). Festive Dismemberment:
Use a Knob Goblin firecracker on July 4th. Friend of Elves:
Kill 10 reindeer at the Crimbo Town Toy Factory with the Unionize The Elves sign equiped. The Unionize The Elves sign can be found at the Crimbo Town Toy Factory. You can increase the chance of the sign dropping by equiping a ring of conflict or using deordorant (anything that reduces the chance of combat). Reindeer Hunter:
Kill 100 reindeer at the Crimbo Town Toy Factory with the Unionize The Elves sign equiped. The Unionise the Elves sign can be found at the Crimbo Town Toy Factory. Gadget Inspector:
Find ten clockwork keys in a single Ascension (must be dropped by an enemy, not bought). Gender Bender:
Get your sex changed 30 times in the Sleazy Back Alley. Golden Meat Stack:
Visit the trophy hut with 1,000,000 meat during a hardcore ascension. Gourdcore:
While in hardcore, complete the Gourd quest 21 times (up to 25 items). Jack of Several Trades:
Acquire all of the Gnome skills permanently. Let My Bugbears Go:
Visit the Bugbear Pens in a bugbear outfit and get the "A Day in the Life" adventure. You must have first completed the Spooky Gravy Barrow quest. Little Chickadee:
You must have at least 1000 drunkenness when you try to purchase the trophy. You can do this by using ! potions. ! potions, also called bang potions, can be found by using either a "large box" or a "small box" which are available at The Dungeons of Doom. Look, Ma! No Pants!:
You must not have worn pants at the end of 2005 (New Year's 2006). AKA The Pantsless trophy. Silver Yeti:
Use the "Yeti Protest Sign" 10 times. No longer attainable. Golden Yeti:
Use the "Yeti Protest Sign" 100 times. No longer attainable. I Heart Canadia:
Drink 30 white Canadians. Palindrophy:
Have a Pagoda in your Campground. Platinum Skull:
Eat 5 Spaghetti With Skullheads. Slice and Dice:
Ascend with a 20 lb stab bat as your familiar. The Ghuol Cup:
Eat 11 ghuol guolashes. The Three Amigos:
Donate one million meat to each statue in The Hall of The Legends of The Times of Old. This can occur over the course of several ascensions. This Stupid Trophy:
Be present for the Ascension roll out (June 9, 2005). AKA This lousy trophy. No longer attainable. Three-Tiered Trophy:
With a stomach of steel (requires you to be on a Teetotaller ascension) and on the Feast of Boris day, eat a three-tiered wedding cake (available at the gift shop after your 7th ascension). Tiny Plastic Trophy:
Get all 32 tiny plastic figures in your display case. Trivially Skilled:
Permanently keep the starting skill of every class (six of them). Weeping Pizza:
Eat 5 White Chocolate And Tomato Pizzas. Your Log Saw Something That Night:
Enter the text 'Laura Palmer' into the notes section of the quest log. A.K.A. the instatrophy. Scourge of Seals:
Reach level 30 in the Seal Clubber class. Tzar of Turtles:
Reach level 30 in the Turtle Tamer class. Sauciest Saucier:
Reach level 30 in the Sauceror class. Potentate of Pasta:
Reach level 30 in the Pastamancer class. Maestro of Mariachi:
Reach level 30 in the Accordion Thief class. Duke of Disco:
Reach level 30 in the Disco Bandit class.

8) -Item Locations-

For item statistics, visit KoL: Item Effects

Cobb's Knob: Outskirts of the Knob: bowl of cottage cheese chef's hat Dr. Hobo's map Knob Goblin firecracker Knob Goblin pants Knob Goblin scimitar Knob Goblin tongs Knob Goblin Uberpants (must have a ten-leaf clover in your inventory) Strongness elixir viking helmet Cobb's Knob Kitchens: dry noodles Knob Kitchen Grab-Bag (must have a ten-leaf clover in inventory) (gives a random assortment of knob kitchen items) Knob mushroom Knob sausage spices tomato wad of dough Cobb's Knob Treasury: beans Dense Meat stack (must have a ten-leaf clover in your inventory) Knob Goblin elite helm Knob Goblin elite pants Knob Goblin elite polearm Knob Goblin visor meat stack Cobb's Knob Harem: Knob Goblin elite helm Knob Goblin elite pants Knob Goblin elite polearm Knob Goblin harem pants Knob Goblin harem veil Knob Goblin perfume (guaranteed drop with a ten-leaf clover) Knob Goblin Laboratory: Knob Goblin love potion Knob Goblin seltzer Knob Goblin steroids Knob Goblin superseltzer scrumptious reagent Cobb's Knob Menagerie, Level 1: cherry lime orange Cobb's Knob Menagerie, Level 2: giant moxie weed moxie weed Cobb's Knob Menagerie, Level 3: bottle of gin bottle of rum bottle of tequila bottle of whiskey bottle of vodka boxed wine The Knob Shaft: (Enemies are resistant to physical damage here, use elemental spells/items) bubblewrap ore styrofoam ore cardboard ore Crimbo Town: felt googly eye length of string stuffing toy wheel wooden block Degrassi Knoll: Bugbear Beanie Bugbear Bungguard cog Degrassi Knoll Shopping List Empty Meat Tank eyepatch frilly skirt gnoll lips gnoll teeth Gnollish Flyswatter Gnollish Pie Tin Gnollish Plunger Gnollish toolbox ice-cold Willer Knoll mushroom maiden wig Skewer spring sprocket tires wad of dough Fernswarthy's Tower: disembodied brain grapefruit grapes lemon orange strawberry taco shell uncooked chorizo wad of dough Little Canadia: Outskirts of Camp Logging Camp: forest tears pine tar poutine shaving cream Camp Logging Camp: balaclava balaclava baklava Blatantly Canadian disbelief suspenders leaflet los chinos maple syrup poutine supportive bra wooden axe Mt. McLargeHuge: Itznotyersitz Mine: 7-Foot Dwarven Mattock asbestos ore (Must be wearing the Mining Gear) chrome ore (Must be wearing the Mining Gear) linoleum ore (Must be wearing the Mining Gear) meat stack (Must be wearing the Mining Gear) Miner's Helmet Miner's Pants stone of eXtreme power (Must be wearing the Mining Gear) The Goatlet: bottle of whiskey glass of goat's milk goat cheese goat beard sabre teeth The eXtreme Slope: eXtreme mittens eXtreme scarf frigid ninja stars gr8ps Mountain Stream soda sk8board snowboarder pants t8er tots The Icy Peak: bag of Cheat-Os crazy little Turkish delight ga-ga radio insanely spicy bean burrito penguin skin ram stick Ram's Face Ale ram horns six pack of Mountain Stream unrefined Mountain Stream syrup yeti fur The Icy Peak in the Recent Past: (Area does not exist anymore) delicious noodles iron pasta spoon kneecapping stick mafia aria Mob Penguin cellular phone penguin skin scroll of pasta summoning support cummerbund yeti fur The Lair of the Ninja Snowmen: chopsticks Cold Ninja Mask Frigid Ninja Stars frozen nunchaku Icy Katana Hilt ninja mop ninja hot pants pail rice bowl ridiculously overelaborate ninja weapon Orcish Frat House: bottle of gin bottle of vodka deodorant homoerotic frat-paddle Ice-cold Sir Schlitz ice-cold fotie Orcish baseball cap Orcish cargo shorts roofie handfull of drink tickets (must have a ten-leaf clover in your inventory) roll of drink tickets (Visit the Orcish Frat House dressed in the Frat Boy Ensemble suit with a ten-leaf clover in your inventory to get this. Using the roll with give you six random bottles of alcohol.) Seaside Town, 28 Days Later: (This location is not currently in the game) Market Square, 28 Days Later: asparagus knife chef's hat dirty hobo gloves frilly shirt frilly skirt Knob Goblin pants Knob Goblin tongs Mad Train wine maiden wig moxie weed razor-sharp can lid stalk of asparagus wad of dough zombie pineal gland The Mall of Loathing, 28 Days Later: big red clown nose bloody clown pants bottle of tequila cranberries filthy corduroys homoerotic frat-paddle ice-cold beer long skinny balloon loose teeth piece of wedding cake windchimes zombie pineal gland Wrong Side of the Tracks, 28 Days Later: 33398 scroll awful poetry journal charrrm draggin' ball hat Mountain Stream Soda scroll of drastic healing snakehead charrrm soft green echo eyedrop antidote thin black candle Warm Subject gift certificate zombie pineal gland South of the Border bottle of tequila can of Red Minotaur chorizo taco handsomeness potion irate sombrero jabañero-flavored chewing gum jumping beans lime-and-chile-flavored chewing gum mariachi G-string marzipan skull Meleegra™ pills pickle-flavored chewing gum pile of candy poultrygeist (bet on "the other one" in the "Finger-Lickin'... Death." cockfight) questionable taco tamarind-flavored chewing gum The Barrel Full Of Barrels: bloody mary bottle of gin bottle of rum bottle of tequila bottle of vodka bottle of whiskey boxed wine concentrated magicalness pill Doc Galaktik's Ailment Ointment Doc Galaktik's Homeopathic Elixir Doc Galaktik's Restorative Balm enchanted barbell extra-strength strongness elixir fine wine giant moxie weed jug-o-magicalness Knob Goblin seltzer Knob Goblin superseltzer magicalness-in-a-can margarita martini monkey wrench moxie weed salty dog screwdriver shot of grapefruit schnapps shot of orange schnapps shot of tomato schnapps soda water strawberry daiquiri strawberry wine strongness elixir suntan lotion of moxiousness tequila sunrise vodka and cranberry whiskey and cola whiskey sour white Canadian wine spritzer The Bat Hole: Entryway: bat wing bat guano briefcase Pine-Fresh air freshener wad of dough Guano Junction: baseball bat guano bat wing batgut briefcase broken skull loose teeth sonar-in-a-biscuit vampire heart The Batrat and Ratbat Burrow: bat guano bat wing batgut rat appendix ratgut The Castle In The Clouds In The Sky: Angry Farmer candy awful poetry journal chaos butterfly disturbing fanfic furry fur giant needle Heavy D Mick's IcyVapoHotness Rub Original G plot hole probability potion procrastination potion Thin Black Candle Warm Subject gift certificate wolf mask The Daily Dungeon: From treasure chests in room 1-9: can of maces concentrated magicalness pill enchanted barbell extra-strength strongness elixir giant moxie weed jug-o-magicalness Pick-O-Matic lockpicks potato sprout ring of half-assed regeneration rubber axe skeleton key skeleton key ring suntan lotion of moxiousness walrus-tusk earring From room 10: Boris's key Boris's ring Jarlsberg's earring Jarlsberg's key Sneaky Pete's breath spray Sneaky Pete's key The Deep Fat Friars' Gate: cast diamond-studded cane evil golden arch flaming crutch hellion cube Hey Deze Map Hot Katana Blade hot wing Imp Ale infernal insoles leather mask Ninja Hot Pants ruby W wussiness potion The Dungeons of Doom: baby killer bee cornuthaum large box mind flayer corpse ring of aggravate monster royal jelly small box vorpal blade The "Fun" House: acid-squirting flower big red clown nose bloody clown pants bottle of gin bottle of rum bottle of tequila bottle of whiskey bottle of vodka boxed wine box bugbear beanie bugbear bungguard clown shoes disease foolscap fool's cap lemon long skinny balloon The Haiku Dungeon: bling-bling (Requires ten-leaf clover) Bugbear Bungguard crusty L-shaped piece of metal Fairy Gravy ice-cold beer (Willer) locked Orcish meat locker meat from yesterday rusty L-shaped piece of metal The Haunted Pantry: Asparagus Knife meat paste Pretentious Paint razor-sharp can lid stalk of asparagus The Dolphin Kings Map tomato The Hermitage: wooden figurine hot buttered roll banjo strings jabañero pepper fortune cookie golden twig ketchup catsup sweet rims dingy planks volleyball ten-leaf clover (has a certain chance of showing up here every day) The Hippy Camp: carob chunks decorative fountain Feng Shui for Big Dumb Idiots filthy corduroys filthy knitted dread sack fruit bowl (Requires a ten-leaf clover) fruit basket (Requires a ten-leaf clover and the Filthy Hippy Disguise) hemp bracelet henna tattoo (Must wear the Filthy Hippy Disguise) herbs Jug-O-Magicalness (Need disguise) necklace chain patchouli incense stick phat turquoise bead piercing post reodorant secret blend of herbs and spices (Need disguise) tambourine bells Uncle Jick's Brownie Mix vial of patchouli oil (Need disguise) wad of tofu windchimes The Hole In The Sky: line star star chart The Limerick Dungeon: dungeoneer's dungarees foon (You need a ten-leaf clover in your inventory) spork tassel The Misspelled Cemetary: cranberries dead guy's watch (+1 adventures a day) disembodied brain ghuol ears ghuol egg ghuol guolash grave robbing shovel lihc eye lihc face loose teeth skeleton bone smart skull spiked femur The Obligatory Pirate's Cove: abridged dictionary (must be wearing the Swashbuckling Getup) acoustic guitarrr arrrgyle socks barrnacle bottle of rum charrrm crowbarrr eyepatch leotarrrd pirate pelvis safarrri hat skeleton bone (must be wearing the Swashbuckling Getup) snakehead charrrm spices (must be wearing the Swashbuckling Getup) stuffed shoulder parrot sunken chest swashbuckling pants The Palindome: batblade bat wing batgut bottle of gin drab sonata cat appendix catgut Elf Farm Raffle ticket enormous belt buckle gnatwing Guitar Pick Ketchup Hound leather chaps lemon lime mesh cap olive papaya suntan lotion of moxiousness taco shell The Penultimate Fantasy Airship: Amulet of Extreme Plot Significance cocoa eggshell fragment Giant Castle Map glowing red eye Metallic A Mohawk wig oversized pizza cutter Penultimate Fantasy chest phonics down photoprotoneutron torpedo ridiculously huge sword S.O.C.K. scroll of drastic healing soft green echo eyedrop antidote super-spikey hair gel tiny house titanium assault umbrella The Sewer: Disco Ball Disco Mask helmet turtle Mariachi Pants Pasta Spoon Ravioli Hat Saucepan Scroll Of Turtle Summoning Seal Clubbing Club seal tooth spices stolen accordion worthless gewgaw worthless knick-knack worthless trinket The Shore, Inc. Travel Agency: Tropical Paradise Island Getaway: Ice-Cold Six Pack little paper umbrella Valuable Trinket Distant Lands Dude Ranch Adventure: Anticheese ten-leaf clover coconut shell Large Donkey Mountain Ski Resort: Abominable Snowcone Barbed-Wire Fence cast magical ice cubes The Sleazy Back Alley: bum cheek dirty hobo gloves Mad Train wine moxie weed spider web the Slug Lord's map The Spooky Forest:
bar skin
barskin hat
Bottle of used blood (must have the vampire heart to trade)
bowl of lucky charms (must have a ten-leaf clover)
dried face
helmet turtle
mosquito larva
moxie weed
saucepan
scroll of turtle summoning
spices
Spooky-Gro Fertilizer
spooky mushroom
spooky sapling
spooky shrunken head
spooky stick
Spooky Temple map (Select the first option in the 'Maps and Legends' adventure)
vampire heart (with wooden stakes equipped)
wooden stakes

Spooky Gravy Barrow (requires an elemental gravy fairy familiar):
enchanted toothpick
halfberd
spooky fairy gravy
spooky mushroom
small leather glove
teeny-tiny ninja stars
tiny ninja sword

Spookyraven Manor:
The Haunted Billiards Room:
pool cue
handful of hand chalk
1-ball
2-ball
3-ball
4-ball
5-ball
6-ball
7-ball
8-ball
9-ball (with a clover)

Haunted Kitchen:
chef's hat
corn holder
cardboard katana
eggbeater
fricasseed brains
stale baguette
ancient frozen dinner
leftovers of indeterminate origin
bottle of popskull
dishrag
brains casserole (use a clover)

Haunted Conservatory:
pile of dusty animal bones
meat stack

The Haunted Library:
inkwell
tattered scrap of paper
disintegrating quill pen
snifter of thoroughly aged brandy

The Haunted Gallery:
antique greaves
antique helmet
antique spear
antique shield
broken sword
pitchfork
lupine sword
snarling wolf shield
serpentine sword
snake shield

The Haunted Bathroom:
bottle of Monsieur Bubble
cardboard wakizashi
gob of wet hair
roll of toilet paper

The Haunted Bedroom:
grouchy restless spirit
old coin purse
old leather wallet

The Haunted Ballroom:
dance card
dehydrated caviar
desiccated apricot
flute of flat champagne
tap shoes
worn tophat


The Thatch-Roofed Casino:
Fruit Insanity:
cherry
jumbo olive
lemon
lime
orange
The Poker Room:
sweet ninja sword
Lemon Party slot:
big rock (must have a ten-leaf clover)
plastic passion fruit
cherry
jumbo olive
lemon
lime
orange

The Typical Tavern:
The Tavern Cellar (during the rat quest):
Baron Von Ratsworth's monocle
bottle of rum
boxed wine
ice-cold beer (Sir Schlitz)
ice-cold beer (Willer)
ice-cold fotie
rat appendix
rat whisker
After the rat quest is completed:
beer lens



The Valley Beyond The Orc Chasm:
1337 7r0uZ0RZ
30669 scroll
33398 Scroll
334 Scroll
Draggin' Ball Hat
Dyspepsi-Cola
f3d0r4
Flaming Talons
Lowercase N
meat vortex
pr0n legs
Spam Witch sammich
Tasty Fun Good Rice Candy
Trollhouse Cookies

Thugnderdome:
clockwork key
cog
flange
gnauga hide
spring
sprocket

Whitey's Grove:
boxed wine
mullet wig
piece of wedding cake
White Castle burger
White Castle fries
white chocolate chips
white collar
white lightning
white picket fence
white satin pants
white satin shield
white sword
whitesnake skin

Tome of Snowcone Summoning:
Green Snowcone (Green Tongue effect adds +5 to familiar weight)
Red Snowcone (Red Tongue effect makes you get 25% more meat from monsters)
Purple Snowcone (Purple Tongue effect recovers 20HP/MP at the end of each adventure)
Orange Snowcone (Orange Tongue effect increases the stats gained in battle)
Blue Snowcone (Blue Tongue effect increases the item drop rate bt 25%)
Black Snowcone (Black Tongue has the effect of all the snowcones at once)

McPhee's Grimoire of Hilarious Object Summoning:
bag of airline peanuts
brick
clown hammer
defective skull
explosion-flavored chewing gum
fake fake vomit
fake hand
jazz soap
joybuzzer
magical ice cube with a fly in it
pet rock "Groucho" disguise
pet rock "Snooty" disguise
rubber emo roe
the Amulet of Yendor
whoopie cushion
wind-up chattering teeth
x-ray specs
yellow snowcone

A Journey to the Center of Your Mind:
orange-frosted astral cupcake
blue-frosted astral cupcake
pink-frosted astral cupcake
green-frosted astral cupcake
purple-frosted astral cupcake
Cerebral Cloche
Cerebral Crossbow
Cerebral Culottes
homeopathic healing powder
ice stein
munchies pill

Exploded drinks: (Randomly spit out when a bartender-in-the-box explodes from making a large number of drinks)
beertini
papaya slung
salty slug
tomato daiquiri

Exploded food: (Randomly spit out when a chef-in-the-box explodes from too much cooking)
carob chunk noodles
chorizo brownies
white chocolate and tomato pizza

Unavailable items: (You are no longer able to get these items in the game)
blood rose
bow
bow staff
bowlegged pants
bowler
Comfy Blanket
Crimbo hat
Crimbo pants
Crimbo Pressie
Crimbo sword
Doc's Miracle Cure
empty blowgun
Ent cider
loaded serum blowguns
Lovecat Tail
Oriole Feather Headdress
Plastic Passion Fruit
Questionable Taco
rose tinted glasses
sober pill
tiny plastic sword
tortise's blessing
Wrapping Paper
Yeti Protest Sign
zombie pineal gland


Quest Related Items:
Star Stuff - Adventure at the Hole In The Sky to get Star Charts, Stars and Lines. Use the Star Chart and you will be able to enter combinations of Stars and Lines. You can make one item per Star Chart. Star Buckler - 4 Stars, 6 Lines star boomerang - 4 Stars, 5 Lines star spatula - 5 Stars, 5 Lines Star Crossbow - 5 Stars, 6 Lines star stiletto - 5 Stars, 4 Lines Star Hat - 5 Stars, 3 Lines Star Pants - 7 Stars, 7 Lines Star Staff - 6 Stars, 5 Lines Star Starfish - 6 Stars, 4 Lines Star Sword - 7 Stars, 4 Lines Star Throwing Star - 4 Stars, 2 Lines Richard's Star Key - 8 Stars, 7 Lines Star Shirt - 15 Stars, 15 Lines Pixel Stuff - Travel to the Wrong Side Of The Tracks and visit The Crackpot Mystic's Shed. Listen to his entire story to get a Continuum Transfuctioner. You will need the transfuctioner equiped (and have your primary stat above 20) before you can access the The Inexplicable Door, located in the Distant Woods. Adventure in this new location to gather pixels, which can be used by the Mystic to make Pixel items. white Pixel (1 red, 1 green, 1 blue) red Pixel potion (2 red, 3 black) - Heal 25-30 HP blue Pixel potion (2 blue, 3 black) - Recover 25-30 MP green Pixel potion (3 green, 4 black) - Recovers 18-20 HP/MP purple Pixel pie (2 red, 2 blue, 5 white) Pixel hat (10 white, 15 green) Pixel pants (20 red, 10 black) Pixel sword (20 white, 10 black, 10 blue) pixel shield (20 red, 10 black, 10 white) - Muscle +5 Digital key (30 white) monster bait (20 red, 15 white) - Monsters will be more attracted to you Frequent Traveler Rewards - At the Shore, you can take unlimited trips at 3 locations. The first place gives Muscle (or occasionally a Ten-leaf clover, an anticheese, or an abomitable snowcone), the second Mysticality (sometimes giving three valuable trinkets or two ice-cold six-packs) and the third Moxie (sometimes giving a Barbed-Wire Fence or a cast). Each trip costs 500 Meat and 3 Adventures. 5 Trips - Dinghy Plans (Used to build a Dinghy dinghy to get to The Mysterious Island of Mystery) 12 Trips - Meat Globe (Gives meat and stats) 23 Trips - Fuzzy Dice (A familiar) 32 Trips - Cheap Toaster (Can make three pieces of toast every day. Toast will give 1-2 adventures when you eat it.)
Shop Lists: A Suspicious-Looking Guy Goofballs - 0 (Increases by 1000 each purchase) (Goofballs enhance your stats for one day, then you enter "Goofball Withdrawal" and lose stats) rose-colored glasses - Given to you free if you have the Grey plague. Makes your text appear black. Doc Galaktik's Medicine Show Curative Nostrum - Variable Cost (Will immediately and completely heal your HP) Fizzy Invigorating Tonic - Variable Cost (Will immediately and completely restore your MP) Doc Galaktik's Pungent Unguent - 30 Meat Doc Galaktik's Ailment Ointment - 60 Meat Doc Galaktik's Restorative Balm - 120 Meat Doc Galaktik's Homeopathic Elixir - 240 Meat The Bugbear Bakery Gnollish pie tin - 30 Meat wad of dough - 50 Meat taco shell - 80 Meat skewer - 80 Meat Gnollish casserole dish - 150 Meat rolling pin - 500 Meat unrolling pin - 500 Meat The Demon Market can of hair spray - 24 Meat chewing gum on a string - 30 Meat Newbiesport™ tent - 40 Meat anti-anti-antidote - 40 Meat spray paint - 50 Meat beer cartilage - 50 Meat fermenting powder - 70 Meat soda water - 70 Meat casino pass - 100 Meat hermit permit - 100 Meat strongness elixir - 200 Meat magicalness-in-a-can - 200 Meat moxie weed - 200 Meat Familiar-Gro™ Terrarium - 500 Meat Hatorade - 500 Meat cocktailcrafting kit - 1,000 Meat E-Z Cook Oven™ - 1,000 Meat The Gift Shop plain brown wrapper - 50 Meat (holds 1 type of item) less-than-three-shaped box - 100 Meat (holds up to 2 types of item) exactly-three-shaped box - 100 Meat (holds up to 3 types, available after your third ascension) chocolate box - 500 Meat (holds up to 4 types, available after your sixth ascension) miniature coffin - 1000 Meat (holds up to 5 types, available after your ninth ascension) solid asbestos box - 2000 Meat (holds up to 6 types, available after your 12th ascension) solid linoleum box - 5000 Meat (holds up to 7 types, available after your 15th ascension) solid chrome box - 10,000 Meat (holds up to 8 types, available after your 18th ascension) cryptic puzzle box - 20,000 Meat (holds up to 9 types, available after your 21th ascension) refrigerated biohazard container - 50,000 Meat (holds up to 10 types, available after your 24th ascension) magnetic field - 100,000 Meat (holds up to 11 types, available after your 27th ascension) black velvet box - free (holds up to 11 types of items, available only on Valentine's Day) potted cactus - 50 Meat daisy - 100 Meat stuffed can of asparagus - 50 Meat stuffed dodecapede - 100 Meat mugcake - 50 Meat urinal cake - 100 Meat white balloon - 50 Meat green balloon - 100 Meat potted fern - 200 Meat (post ascension) Happy Birthday, Claude! cake - 200 Meat (post ascension) stuffed ghuol whelp - 200 Meat (appears after 2nd ascension) heart-shaped balloon - 200 Meat (appears after 2nd ascension) potted tulip - 500 Meat (appears after 4th ascension) personalized birthday cake - 500 Meat (appears after 4th ascension) stuffed zobmie - 500 Meat (appears after 5th ascension) anniversary balloon - 500 Meat (appears after 5th ascension) Venus flytrap - 1000 Meat (appears after 7th ascension) three-tiered wedding cake - 1000 Meat (appears after 7th ascension) Mylar balloon - 1000 Meat (appears after 8th ascension) Raggedy Hippy doll - 1000 Meat (appears after 8th ascension) all-purpose flower - 2000 Meat (appears after 10th ascension) babycakes - 2000 Meat (appears after 10th ascension) stuffed stab bat - 2000 Meat (11th) Kevlar balloon - 2000 Meat (11th) exotic orchid - 5000 Meat (13th) blue velvet cake - 5000 Meat (13th) apathetic lizardman doll - 5000 Meat (14th) thought balloon - 5000 Meat (14th) long-stemmed rose - 10000 Meat (16th) congratulatory cake - 10000 Meat (16th) stuffed yeti - 10000 Meat (17th) rat head balloon - 10000 Meat (17th) gilded lily - 20000 Meat (19th) angel-food cake - 20000 Meat (19th) mini-zeppelin - 20000 Meat (20th) stuffed Mob Penguin - 20000 Meat (20th) deadly nightshade - 50000 Meat (22th) devil's-food cake - 50000 Meat (22th) Mr. Balloon - 50000 Meat (23th) stuffed sabre-toothed lime - 50000 Meat (23th) black lotus - 100000 Meat (25th) birthday party jellybean cheesecake - 100000 Meat (25th) giant stuffed bugbear - 100000 Meat (26th) red balloon - 100000 Meat (26th) The Hippy Store (must be wearing the Filthy Hippy Disguise) herbs - 64 Meat orange - 70 Meat grapefruit - 70 Meat grapes - 70 Meat olive - 70 Meat tomato - 70 Meat strawberry - 70 Meat The Knob Goblin Laboratory (must be wearing the Knob Goblin Elite Guard Uniform) Knob Goblin seltzer - 80 Meat Knob Goblin stink bomb - 130 Meat Knob Goblin nasal spray - 150 Meat Knob Goblin love potion - 170 Meat Knob Goblin eyedrops - 200 Meat Knob Goblin sharpening spray - 230 Meat Knob Goblin steroids - 250 Meat Knob Goblin pet-buffing spray - 250 Meat Knob Goblin learning pill - 300 Meat The Meatsmith's Shop meatsmithing guide - 50 Meat sword hilt - 100 Meat helmet recipe - 100 Meat pants kit - 100 Meat big stick - 100 Meat crossbow string - 100 Meat whip kit - 100 Meat buckler buckle - 100 Meat skirt / kilt kit - 100 Meat Tenderizing Hammer - 1000 Meat The Shadowy Store (available only to Accordion Thieves and Disco Bandits) Ye Olde Golde Frontes - 1500 Meat Bejeweled Accordion Strap - 2000 Meat Moxie Magnet - 3000 Meat The Smacketeria (available only to Seal Clubbers and Turtle Tamers) Medicinal Herb's medicinal herbs - 100 Meat cheap wind-up clock - 200 Meat Blood Of The Wereseal - 500 Meat Enchanted Brass Knuckles - 1000 Meat Gouda's Grimoire and Grocery (available only to Pastamancers and Saucerors of a certain level) magical mystery juice - 100 meat MSG - 1000 meat delectable catalyst - 1000 meat ladle of mystery - 3000 meat special sauce glove - 5000 meat kickback cookbook - 4000 meat Codex of Capsaicin Conjuration - 4000 Meat Gazpacho's Glacial Grimoire - 4000 Meat Degrassi Knoll General Store (available only to Mus sign users after ascension) spring - 20 Meat sprocket - 20 Meat cog - 20 Meat empty meat tank - 20 Meat tires - 28 Meat bugbear beanie - 70 Meat bugbear bungguard - 70 Meat Gnollish plunger - 80 Meat Gnollish flyswatter - 80 Meat frilly skirt - 80 Meat maiden wig - 80 Meat Degrassi Knoll Bakery (available only to Mus sign users after ascension) Gnollish pie tin - 30 Meat wad of dough - 50 Meat flat dough - 70 Meat skewer - 80 Meat taco shell - 80 Meat Gnollish casserole dish - 150 Meat Little Canadia Jewelers (available only to Mys sign users after ascension) piercing post - 64 Meat necklace chain - 70 Meat hemp bracelet - 150 Meat ring setting - 200 Meat jewelry-making pliers - 1,000 Meat Chez Snooteé (available only to Mys sign users after ascension) Peche a la Frog - 50 Meat Au Jus Gezund Heit - 75 Meat Bouillabaise Coucher Avec Moi - 100 Meat The Gnomish Micromicrobrewery (available only to Mox sign users after ascension) Petite Porter - 50 Meat Scrawny Stout - 75 Meat Infinitesimal IPA - 100 Meat The Armory and Leggery Melee Weapons cool whip - 30 Meat sweet ninja sword - 50 Meat suede shortsword - 300 Meat bamboo bokuto - 750 Meat 25-meat staff - 525 Meat two-handed depthsword - 900 Meat bill bec-de-bardiche glaive-guisarme - 1,125 Meat Ranged Weapons slingshot - 150 Meat slightly peevedbow - 450 Meat lead yo-yo - 600 Meat sack of doorknobs - 825 Meat lucky ball-and-chain - 975 Meat automatic catapult - 1,125 Meat Hats snorkel - 30 Meat Kentucky-style derby - 50 Meat pentacorn hat - 300 Meat goofily-plumed helmet - 525 Meat yellow plastic hard hat - 675 Meat wooden salad bowl - 900 Meat football helmet - 1,125 Meat Pants studded leather boxer shorts - 50 Meat chain-mail monokini - 225 Meat junk-mail pants - 375 Meat paper-plate-mail pants - 600 Meat troutpiece - 825 Meat alpha-mail pants - 1,050 Meat The White Citadel White Citadel burger - 100 Meat White Citadel fries - 80 Meat onion shurikens - 80 Meat Regular Cloaca Cola - 80 Meat Diet Cloaca Cola - 80 Meat Cherry Cloaca Cola - 80 Meat

9) -Skills-

Level Skill Type Description Duration MP Cost Meat Cost

1	Seal Clubbing Frenzy	Self Buff	+2 Muscle	5	1	N/A
1	Hide of the Otter	Passive	+20 Damage absorption			1000
2	Claws of the Otter	Passive	+3 Melee damage			2000
3	Tongue of the Otter	Healing	Heals 10-20 HP, Cures Beaten Up		7	3000
4	Thrust-Smack	Combat	Attack with 2x normal damage		3	4000
5	Super-Advanced Meathsmithing	Passive	Allows advanced smithing			5000
6	Eye of the Stoat	Passive	Skills never miss, decreases fumbling, increases critical hits			6000
7	Hide of the Walrus	Passive	+40 Damage absorption			7000
8	Claws of the Walrus	Passive	+4 Melee damage			8000
9	Tongue of the Walrus	Healing	Heals 30-40 HP, Cures Beaten Up		10	9000
10	Lunging Thrust-Smack	Combat	Attack with 3x normal damage		8	10000
11	Rage of the Reindeer	Self Buff	+10% Muscle, +10 Melee Damage	5	10	11000
12	Double-Fisted Skull Smashing	Passive	Dual wielding (wield a one-handed weapon in each of your hands)			12000
13	Northern Exposure	Passive	so-so cold resistance			13000
14	Musk of the Moose	Self Buff	Makes you more likely to encounter monsters	5?	10	14000
15	Pulverise	Passive	Allows use of the Malus of Forethought and the smash ability			15000

Malus of Forethought:
Allows you to pulverize items into powders. The more powerful the item, the more powder you get.
Smashing valuable items will sometimes give nuggets and wads instead of powder.
Smash an item with an elemental enchantment to get the associated powder.
You can cook powders with scrumptious reagents to make phials, which convert all your damage into elemental damage.
Cooking an elemental wad with a scrumdiddlyumptious solution will transform it into a different element.

• Twinkly Powder
• Stench Powder
• Spooky Powder
• Sleazy Powder
• Hot Powder
• Cold Powder
• Useless powder - Result of smashing items without an enchantment on them.
• Ultimate wad - Obtained by smashing an ultra-rare item.

The Malus of Forethought will allow you to combine 5 powders of the same type into a nugget, and 5 nuggets into a wad.
Powders, when used, give resistance to the associated element. Twinkly Powder gives physical resistance.
Nuggets, when used, give a +3 damage boost of the associated element.
Wads, when used, give +10 damage of an element in addition to several stat points. Costs 1 spleen.
Using an Ultimate Wad will instantly level up your character, costing 15 spleen.


Level Skill Type Description Duration MP Cost Meat Cost

1	Patience of the Tortoise	Self Buff	+1 Muscle, +4 Max HP	5	1	N/A
1	Headbutt	Combat	Deals damage		3	1000
2	Skin of the Leatherback	Passive	+40 Damage Absorption			2000
3	Amphibian Sympathy	Passive	+5 Familiar weight			3000
4	Ghostly Shell	Buff	+40 Damage Absorption	10	6	4000
5	Armorcraftiness	Passive	Allows advanced smithing			5000
6	Tenacity of the Snapper	Buff	+8 Melee Damage	10	8	6000
7	Kneebutt	Combat	Bonus to hit, chance of stunning enemy		?	7000
8	Empathy of the Newt	Buff	+5 Familiar Weight	10	15	8000
9	Reptilian Fortitude	Buff	+30 Max HP	10	10	9000
10	Shieldbutt	Combat	Weakens opponent, always hits		5	10000
11	Wisdom of the Elder Tortoises	Passive	+50% Max MP			11000
12	Astral Shell	Buff	+80 Damage Absorption, elemental resistance	10	10	12000
13	Cold-Blooded Fearlessness	Passive	so-so spooky resistance			13000
14	Hero of the Half Shell	Passive	Use muscle to determine enemies to hit			12000
15	Tao of the Terrapin	Passive	Doubled effectiveness of hats and pants			12000

Level Skill Type Description Duration MP Cost Meat Cost

1	Manicotti Meditation	Self Buff	+2 Mysticality	5	1	N/A
1	Minor Ray of Something	Combat	Deals damage		4	1000
2	Entangling Noodles	Combat	Slows down enemies		3	2000
3	Lasagna Bandages	Healing	Restores 10-30 HP (out of combat) or 10-20 HP (in combat)		6	3000
4	eXtreme Ray of Something	Combat	Deals 10-16 damage		7	4000
5	Pastamastery	Passive	Can summon 3 dry noodles a day, Allows cooking with dry noodles		10	5000
6	Springy Fusilli	Self Buff	+40% combat initiative	10	10	6000
7	Spirit of Rigatoni	Passive	Mys is used instead of Mus when determining chance to hit with staves			7000
8	Cone of Whatever	Combat	Deals damage		19	8000
9	Spirit of Ravioli	Passive	+25% Max HP			9000
10	Weapon of the Pastalord	Combat	Deals large ammounts of damage		35	10000
11	Leash of Linguini	Self Buff	+5 familiar weight	10	12	11000
12	Canneloni Cocoon	Healing	Restores all HP		20	12000
13	Tolerance of the Kitchen	Passive	so-so heat resistance			13000
14	Flavour of Magic	Self Buff	Always do spell damage using selected element	40	10	14000
15	Transcendental Noodlecraft	Passive	Gives access to The Wok of Ages and expert pastamastery			15000

The Wok of Ages can be used to upgrade certain types of food. It is available only to Mysticality classes.
Each use of the Wok requires one adventure, dry noodles and MSG. MSG can be purchased at the guild store (Gouda's Grimoire and Grocery) for 1000 meat.

• Chow mein (Gives ~28 adventures):
  • rat appendix stir-fry --> rat appendix chow mein
  • Knob sausage stir-fry --> Knob sausage chow mein
  • bat wing stir-fry --> bat wing chow mein
  • pr0n stir-fry --> pr0n chow mein
  • tofu stir-fry --> tofu chow mein
• Lo mein (Gives ~15 adventures. Costs 3-4 fullness.):
  • asparagus stir-fry --> asparagus lo mein
  • olive stir-fry --> olive lo mein
  • Knob stir-fry --> Knob lo mein
  • Knoll stir-fry --> Knoll lo mein
  • spooky stir-fry --> spooky lo mein
• Hi mein (Gives ~28 adventures. 5 fullness. Each will give an effect that adds ~5 elemental damage to your attack for five turns):
  • hot and sour sauce --> hot hi mein
  • cold and sour sauce --> cold hi mein
  • sleazy and sour sauce --> sleazy hi mein
  • spooky and sour sauce --> spooky hi mein
  • stench and sour sauce --> stinky hi mein

Cooking with delectable catalysts requires the level 15 Sauceror skill: The Way of Sauce.
They can be purchased at Gouda's Grimoire and Grocery for 1000 meat.
Wads are made using the level 15 Seal clubber skill: Pulverise

• scrumdiddlyumptious solution = delectable catalyst + scrumptious reagent
• Cold and Sour Sauce = delectable catalyst + Cold wad
• Hot and Sour Sauce = delectable catalyst + Hot wad
• Sleazy and Sour Sauce = delectable catalyst + Sleazy wad
• Spooky and Sour Sauce = delectable catalyst + Spooky wad
• Stench and Sour Sauce = delectable catalyst + Stench wad

Level Skill Type Description Duration MP Cost Meat Cost

1	Sauce Contemplation	Self Buff	+1 Mysticality, +4 Max HP	5	1	N/A
1	Stream of Sauce	Combat	Deals 3-4 damage		3	1000
2	Saucy Salve	Combat	Heals 10-15 HP		4	2000
3	Expert Panhandling	Passive	+10% Meat drop rate			3000
4	Elemental Saucesphere	Buff	Protects from elemental damage	10	10	4000
5	Advanced Saucecrafting	Passive	Enables cooking with scrumptious reagents			5000
6	Saucestorm	Combat	Deals 6-10 damage		12	6000
7	Jalapeño Saucesphere	Buff	If damaged, adds 1-5 damage to attack	10	5	7000
8	Wave of sauce	Combat	Deals damage		23	8000
9	Intrinsic Sauciness	Passive	Increases damage of sauce spells by a number equal to your level			9000
10	Jabañero Saucesphere	Buff	If damaged, adds 1-5 damage to attack	10	10	10000
11	Saucegeyser	Combat	Deals large ammounts of damage		40	11000
12	Impetuous Sauciness	Passive	+5 potion duration			12000
13	Diminished Gag Reflex	Passive	so-so stench resistance			13000
14	Immaculate Seasoning	Passive	Always use correct spell element in combat			14000
15	The Way of Sauce	Passive	Allows use of delectable catalysts			15000

New scrumptious reagent recipes:
oil of slipperiness = jumbo olive + scrumptious reagent (Set Mus and Mys to base Moxie)
oil of expertise = cherry + scrumptious reagent (Set Mus and Mox to base Mysticality)
oil of stability = lime + scrumptious reagent (Set Mys and Mox to base Muscle)
tomato juice of powerful power = tomato + scrumptious reagent (+50% to all stats)
philter of phorce = lemon + scrumptious reagent (+100% Mus)
Ferrigno's Elixir of Power = kiwi + scrumptious reagent (+200% Mus)
serum of sarcasm = olive + scrumptious reagent (+100% Mox)
Connery's Elixir of Audacity = cocktail onion + scrumptious reagent (+100% Mox)
ointment of the occult = grapefruit + scrumptious reagent (+100% Mys)
Hawking's Elixir of Brilliance = tangerine + scrumptious reagent (+100% Mys)
cologne of contempt = dill + scrumptious reagent (?)
potion of potency = orange = + scrumptious reagent (?)
potent potion of potency = kumquat = + scrumptious reagent (?)
cordial of concentration = soda water + scrumptious reagent (+10 spell damage)
concentrated cordial of concentration = tonic water + scrumptious reagent (+?? spell damage)
libation of liveliness = grapes + scrumptious reagent (Increased initiative)
milk of magnesium = glass of goat's milk + scrumptious reagent (More adventures from food?)
perfume of prejudice = jabañero pepper + scrumptious reagent (Increases monster level)
eyedrops of the ermine = strawberry + scrumptious reagent (Increased item drops?)
eyedrops of the ocelot = raspberry + scrumptious reagent (Increased item drops?)



Level Skill Type Description Duration MP Cost Meat Cost

1	Moxious Maneuver	Combat	Deals damage based on muscle		1+	N/A
1	Disco Aerobics	Self Buff	+2 Moxie	5	1	N/A
1	Disco Eye-Poke	Combat	Deals 1-3 damage, -1 monster stats		3	1000
2	Overdeveloped Sense of Self Preservation	Passive	+20% Combat initiative			2000
3	Disco Nap	Healing	Heals 20 HP		8	3000
4	Disco Dance of Doom	Combat	Deals 4-6 damage, -3 monster stats		5	4000
5	Advanced Cocktailcrafting	Passive	Can summon three ingredients, allows advanced cocktailcrafting			5000
6	Nimble Fingers	Passive	+20% meat drop rate			6000
7	Disco Dance II: Electric Boogaloo	Combat	Deals 8-10 damage, -3 monster stats		7	7000
8	Mad Looting Skillz	Passive	+20% item drop rate			8000
9	Disco Power Nap	Healing	Heals 40 HP		12	9000
10	Disco Face Stab	Combat	Deals 15-18 damage, -7 monster stats		10	10000
11	Crossbow Fever	Passive	Adds +1 damage per player level for crossbows			11000
12	Ambidextrous Funkslinging	Passive	Use two items per round of combat			12000
13	Heart of Polyester	Passive	so-so sleazy resistance			13000
14	Smooth Movement	Self Buff	Reduce monster encounters	10	10	14000
15	Superhuman Cocktailcrafting	Passive	Can summon five ingredients a day, opens new cocktailcrafting recipies and allows use of Nash Crosby's Still			15000

Nash Crosby's Still can be used to upgrade certain ingredients (up to 10 a day).
Spirit Improver:
bottle of gin --> bottle of Calcutta Emerald
bottle of vodka --> bottle of Definit
bottle of whiskey --> bottle of Domesticated Turkey
bottle of rum --> bottle of Lieutenant Freeman
bottle of tequila --> bottle of Jorge Sinsonte
boxed wine --> boxed champagne
Mixer Hopper:
orange --> kumquat
grapefruit --> tangerine
olive --> cocktail onion
lemon --> kiwi
strawberry --> raspberry
soda water --> tonic water

This is just a temporary location for the new Superhuman Cocktailcrafting recipes:
Basic improved drinks:
gin and tonic = bottle of Calcutta Emerald + tonic water
gibson = bottle of Calcutta Emerald + cocktail onion
rabbit punch = bottle of Domesticated Turkey + raspberry
caipifruta = bottle of Lieutenant Freeman + kiwi
teqiwila = bottle of Jorge Sinsonte + kiwi
tequila sunset = bottle of Jorge Sinsonte + tangerine
mimosette = boxed champagne + kumquat
parisian cathouse = Boxed champagne + rasberry
vodka and tonic = bottle of Definit + tonic water
vodka gibson = bottle of Definit + cocktail onion
whiskey bittersweet = bottle of Domesticated Turkey + kumquat
zmobie = bottle of Lieutenant Freeman + tangerine

Advanced improved drinks:
Mon Tiki = coconut shell + caipifruta
teqiwila slammer = coconut shell + teqiwila
neuromancer = coconut shell + gibson
vodka stratocaster = coconut shell + vodka gibson
gimlet = little paper umbrella + gin and tonic
yellow brick road = little paper umbrella + vodka and tonic
Divine = little paper umbrella + whiskey bittersweet
Gordon Bennet = little paper umbrella + mimosette
Mae West = magical ice cubes + rabbit punch
prussian cathouse = magical ice cubes + parisian cathouse
mandarina colada = magical ice cubes + zmobie
tangarita = magical ice cubes + tequila sunset



Note: Accordion Thief buffs last for 5 turns by default, but will last for 15 turns if you have a Rock 'n' Roll Legend in your inventory. Level Skill Type Description Duration MP Cost Meat Cost

1	Moxious Maneuver	Combat	Deals damage based on muscle		1+	N/A
1	Moxie of the Mariachi	Self Buff	+1 Moxie, +4 Max HP	5	1	N/A
1	The Moxious Madrigal	Buff	+10 Moxie	5/15	2	1000
2	The Magical Mojomuscular Melody	Buff	+10ys, +20 Max MP	5/15	3	2000
3	Cletus's Canticle of Celerity	Buff	+20% combat initiative	5/15	4	3000
4	The Power Ballad of the Arrowsmith	Buff	+10 Muscle, +20 HP	5/15	5	4000
5	The Polka of Plenty	Buff	+50% meat drop rate	5/15	7	5000
6	Brawnee's Anthem of Absorption	Buff	+40 Damage absorption	5/15	13	6000
7	Fat Leon's Phat Loot Lyric	Buff	+20% item drop rate	5/15	12	7000
8	The Psalm of Pointiness	Buff	Enemies take damage when attacking you	5/15	16	8000
9	Jackasses' Symphony of Destruction	Buff	+12 Melee attack damage	5/15	15	9000
10	Stevedave's Shanty of Superiority	Buff	+10% all stats	5/15	30	10000
11	Aloysius'Antiphon of Aptitude	Buff	+1 each stat gained after battle	5/15	40	11000
12	The Ode to Booze	Buff	Get 1 extra adventure per drink	5/15	50	12000
13	The Sonata of Sneakiness	Buff	Reduce chance of combat	5/15	20	13000
14	Carlweather's Cantata of Conflict	Buff	Raise chance of combat	5/15	20	14000
15	Ur-Kel's Aria of Annoyance	Buff	Raises monster level	5/15	30	15000

Skill Description Type Cost How to acquire

Chronic Indigestion	Deals 5-10 damage. Additional 1 damage per fullness. Costs 5MP	Combat	N/A	Eat an insanely spicy enchanted bean burrito
Liver of Steel	Increases maximum drunkeness by 5	Passive	N/A	Quest
Stomach of Steel	Increases maximum fullness by 5	Passive	N/A	Quest
Spleen of Steel	Increases maximum spleen capacity by 5	Passive	N/A	Quest
Summon Snowcones	Allows snowcone summoning once a day. Costs 5MP.	Summoning	Mr. Accessory	Mr. Store
CLEESH	Turns opponent into an amphibian for 10 MP	Combat	N/A	Strange Leaflet
Summon Hilarious Objects	Summon up to three 'hilarious objects' per day. Costs 5MP.	Summoning	Mr. Accessory	Mr. Store
Gnefarious Pickpocketing	Increases meat drop rate by 10 %	Passive	5000	Fragnks
Powers of Observatiogn	+10% Item drop rate	Passive	5000	Fragnks
Torso Awaregness	Enables shirt wearing	Passive	5000	Fragnks
Gnomish Hardigness	+10% Max HP	Passive	5000	Fragnks
Cosmic Ugnderstanding	+10% Max MP	Passive	5000	Fragnks

10) -Ascension Info-

For more information on what ascension is see the official Ascension FAQ.

Ascension occurs after you defeat the Naughty Sorceress and move through The Astral Gash. But before you do that, here are some things you might want to do before ascending: Untinker your car. Pick a useful familiar to bring with you. Gather the parts for a meat maid together. You might as well use up all your adventures because they will be reset to 80 when you are reincarnated.

After ascending, you will enter Valhalla, where you can adventure for a while. Ultimately, there is nothing to do in Valhalla except enter After-After-Life Al's where you can choose a new class, a skill to keep and a new "sign". Sign information is detailed below.
Sign Sign Type Area unlocked Special ability

Mongoose	Muscle	Degrassi Knoll	Increased muscle gain from combat
Wallaby	Increased combat initiative?
Vole	Better critical hits in combat
Platypus	Mysticality	Little Canadia	Increased mysticality gain from combat
Opossum	Occasionally gives 0-3 extra adventures from eating food
Marmot	Will occasionally get a ten-leaf clover after non-combat adventures
Wombat	Moxie	Gnomish Gnomad Camp	Increased moxie gain from combat
Blender	Occasionally increases adventures gained from alcohol
Packrat	Increased item drops from combat

Once you have ascended, visit Mt. Noob and the Toot Oriole will give you a letter from King Ralph XI. Opening this letter will give you a gemstone (type appears to be random), the roman numeral tattoo, and your new class tattoo. The gemstone is useful in the new jewerlymaking crafting system. The number shown on the roman numeral tattoo indicates how many times a person has ascended.

An effective way of making meat in a hardcore game is to buy some hermit permits, buy several chewing gum on a strings, and use the gum to get useless trinkets from the sewer. Trade these trinkets to the Hermit for ten-leaf clovers. Now adventure in the Cobb's Knob Treasury and you will get a dense meat stack (worth 1000 meat) for each clover. Sell the dense meat stack. This tip will only work on days that the Hermit stocks clovers. Thanks to Nikolai Arantus for this strategy.

Coldfront has some good Hardcore Ascension tips and tricks.
The KoL wiki also has a good Ascension Strategy section.
Chrono Mage's Hardcore Ascension Guide.

There are three new areas in the game, but you will only be able to access one of them, depending on which sign you picked at ascension.
You must have picked a muscle sign to enter this area. It is located inside the Degrassi Knoll. It features:
Mushroom Fields - A place where you can grow and harvest mushrooms. You can buy a plot for 5k and plant mushrooms that you will be able to harvest the next day.
The Plunger - Will combine items for you for free. Innabox - A smith who will craft items for free.
The Gym - A muscle gym.
The Bakery - A shop very similar to the bugbear shop in town.
General Store - Sells the parts to a car.
Mayor Zapruder - A person who gives out quests. One of his quests is to grow some special mushrooms.

You must have picked a mysticality sign to enter this area. It is located just above the town. It features:
Outskirts of Camp Logging Camp - A low level area to adventure in.
Camp Logging Camp - A mid level (>30 mys) area to adventure in.
Little Canadia Jewelers - A shop which sells jewelrymaking supplies which you can use to make jewelry.
The Institute for Canadian Studies - A mysticality gym.
Chez Snooteé - A place to buy food. The food is served immediately.
The Super-Secret Canadian Mind-Control Device, which allows you to increase the difficulty of the monsters in the world. Each number added increases the level of all monsters by one.
You must have picked a moxie sign to enter this area. It is located on the desert beach. It features:
Thugndergnome - A mid level area to adventure in. The items necessary for Supertinkering are dropped here.
Gnorman, the Supertinkerer - Allows creation of three component items. See Supertinkering Recipes for more info.
Gnirf, The World's Sneakiest Gnome - Acts like a Moxie gym.
The Gnomish Micromicrobrewery - Serves drinks. Drinks are served immediately and cannot be saved for later.
Fragnk, the Regnaissance Gnome - Teaches skills for 5000 meat each. The skills the Regnaissance Gnome teaches are:
Powers of Observatiogn - This skill makes you observant, like a very, very observant gnome. It increases the number of items you find when fighting monsters.
Gnefarious Pickpocketing - This skill lets you gaffle a little bit more Meat from monsters you defeat.
Torso Awaregness - This skill allows you to understand how to use the middle part of your body to wear things known as "shirts."
Gnomish Hardigness - This skill makes you hardy, like a gnome. A hardy gnome. A hardy boy gnome, or a hardy girl gnome. Doesn't really matter.
Cosmic Ugnderstanding - Like a mystical, mystical gnome, you're more in touch with the Cosmos than most people are. And with the Redbooks.

Shirt descriptions and locations Shirt Name Description "Wear" to get them

Ascension Souvenir T-Shirt	15 power	Given to Ascension testers
frilly shirt	20 power, +3 Mys	Degrassi Knoll
harem girl t-shirt	25 power, +3 Mox	Dropped by Knob Goblin Harem Girls
Mr. Shirt	30 power, +1 all stats	Hacked item
Knob Goblin elite shirt	35 power, +3 Mus, 2 mus required	Knob Goblin Treasury or Harem
filthy hippy poncho	40 power, 5 mus required	In the Hippy Camp
soggy wofl t-shirt	45 power, +3 Mys, 7 mus required, +3 Mus	Orcish Frat House in disguise
loathing eagle baby-doll shirt	45 power, +3 Mox, 7 mus required	Orcish Frat House in disguise
pirate shirt	50 power, +3 Mox, 10 mus required	Pirate Cove in disguise
supportive bra	50 power, +5 Mox, 10 moxie required	Dropped by Lumberjills in Camp Logging Camp
clockwork trench coat	80 power, 25 mus required	Supertinker it together
goth kid t-shirt	100 power, 35 mus required	Use a Warm Subject gift certificate (once only)
rhinestone cowboy shirt	100 power, 35 mus required, +7 mus	Distant Lands Dude Ranch Adventure (Shore, males only)
gingham blouse	100 power, 35 mus required, +7 mus	Distant Lands Dude Ranch Adventure (Shore, females only)
floral print shirt	100 power, 35 mus required, +7 mys	Tropical Paradise Island Getaway (Shore, males only)
coconut bikini top	100 power, 35 mus required, +7 mys	Tropical Paradise Island Getaway (Shore, females only)
souvenir ski t-shirt	100 power, +7 mox, 35 mus required	Large Donkey Mountain Ski Resort (Shore)
star shirt	165 power, +3 all stats, 67 mus required	Combine 15 stars and 15 lines

Every time you complete an ascension, you will receive the following rewards in a letter from King Ralph XI:
a gem (hamethyst, baconstone, or porquoise)
a Roman numeral tattoo indicating the number of softcore ascensions you have completed (up to XI+)
a class tattoo for your new class

Completing a Teetotaller ascension will get you a Retenez L'Herbe Paté
Completing a Boozetafarian ascension will get you a bottle of single-barrel whiskey
Completing a Oxygenarian ascension will get you a Breathetastic™ Premium Canned Air
Consuming one of the above items will give you ~20 adventures and ~60 stat points.

Upon completing a normal Hardcore ascension, you will get the following rewards:
a Pork Elf goodies sack (contains five gemstones)
a sparkly class tattoo
a solid Roman numeral tattoo indicating the number of hardcore ascensions completed (up to XI+)
one of the following stainless steel items, depending on your class:
Seal Clubber - stainless steel shillelagh (club, requires 30 mus, 90 power, +20 melee damage, 4x chance of critical hit, +15% Muscle)
Turtle Tamer - stainless steel skullcap (hat, requires 30 mox, 90 power, +30 maximum HP, +60 damage absorption, +15% Muscle)
Pastamancer - stainless steel solitaire (accessory, requires 30 mys, -2 MP cost, +2 adv/day, +15% Mysticality)
Sauceror - stainless steel scarf (accessory, requires 30 mys, +20 spell damage, +20 monster level, +15% Mysticality)
Disco Bandit - stainless steel slacks (pants, 90 power, requires 30 mox, +15% initiative, +20% Meat, +15% Moxie)
Accordion Thief - stainless steel suspenders (accessory, requires 30 mys, +60 damage absorption, +40 maximum MP, +15% moxie)

Upon completing a pathed Hardcore ascension, you will get one of the following (In addition to the normal hardcore ascension rewards (except the steel items)):

• Completing a hardcore Boozetafarian ascension will get you three bottles of single-barreled whiskey and a crossed-out food tattoo
• Completing a hardcore Teetotaller ascension will get you three Retenez L'Herbe Paté and a crossed-out beer tattoo
• Completing a hardcore Oxygenarian ascension will get you 3x canned air, an oxygen tattoo, an very sparkly class tattoo. In addition, you will get one of the following class specific plexiglass items:
  • Seal Clubber - plexiglass pike pike (spear, requires 75 mus, 180 power, +25 melee damage, +10 PvP fights per day, +30% Muscle)
  • Turtle Tamer - plexiglass pith helmet (hat, requires 75 mox, 180 power, +5 familiar weight, regenerate 10-12 HP and 10-12 MP per adventure, +30% Muscle)
  • Pastamancer - plexiglass pocketwach (accessory, requires 75 mys, -3 MP to use skills, +3 adv/day, +30% Mysticality)
  • Sauceror - plexiglass pinky ring (accessory, requires 75 mys, +30 spell damage, resistance to all elements, +30% Mysticality)
  • Disco Bandit - plexiglass pants (pants, requires 75 mox, 180 power, +25% initiative, +20% item drops from monsters, +30% Moxie)
  • Accordion Thief - plexiglass pendant (accessory, requires 75 mys, never fumble, allows 4 buffs, +30% Moxie)

11) -Credits-

Thanks to all these people who have contributed.

bdwing
CaesarSandy

Alain
anker85
ashamalee
Banukas
Birdy2
BlaDeeBlah
blndbby
BloodRedInk
Buzzkills
Charlie Sumthin
CheapFire
ChickenMan2
Combat Chuck
CoolM
Corbana
craftage
Darguz Parsilvan
d3fiant
Denny Terrio
Devilishone
dumfulio
DVD
Evie2883
fatty_inc
Firestorm ZERO
fluffymuffin
fredbob
futuramafreak
gaevonis
Ghengis
gravel
Gravy Spasm
gromit
handjob
HoADeath
ichi
Icy_Icicle
j1a1g1
Jaarlask
JOBOX
Jonze
Junius
KillerOfThem
l3g3nd
Lathrodec
Leg o Lam
LiamAndMe (and the rest of the Urban Achievers clan)
lolhead
lord_stinkybutt
Louis_the_German
MarieAngie
Masiello The Great
mdxi
Moosenoise
Mr Bill
MrForklift (Much thanks)
Nappa
Nassive
neffie
Nightvol (Much thanks)
Nikolai Arantus
Nomicon
ojoJojoM
OldJanitor
PookieMan
PoolAce
pOOx
pratt
PvP
Quato
qwerty
Qwertys
Ragnok
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raving frothing mad kitten
Rothul
Saundra King
ScratchMe
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Sifter
sir_sid_of_goofball
smacktalk
Snooj
Sonejp
Soth
SourMilk
Squiffle
Starwars_14
StaticFree
Syra the Small
The Phearsome Phantom
ThePopesHat
umfumdisi
UncleAl
Wicana
windswept
WLGades
Yodo


Copyright © 2004-2006 by Kevin Currie.
11/09/06
EOF